Lifetime has found a Dick for Lindsay Lohan.
The actress is scheduled to play Elizabeth Taylor in the Lifetime movie Liz & Dick, which chronicles the film icon's fiery marriage with Richard Burton.
That would be Grant Bowler.
Cue the sexually-charged Lindsanity, folks, because according to the producer, Larry Thompson, there will be many steamy scenes between the couple.
"It's Fourth of July firecrackers going off in the room," said Thompson of the two stars. "We knew from the chemistry that Liz and Dick live again."
"Chemistry means movie magic for sex," he continued, promising Lindsay Lohan nude, or as close has you can come to that on regular television.
"This movie will definitely have as much sex as Lifetime will allow."
Well, cheers to that! As for the stars' 18-year age difference?
"Richard Burton was quite older than Elizabeth Taylor. This is from a visual point of view just about equal to Liz and Dick. It is a perfect match."
Bowler played a hunky werewolf named Cooter in True Blood Season 3, so we're guessing he can handle a dolled-up Lindsay Lohan. Maybe.