Michael Vick Accused of Al Qaeda Ties, Sued For $63 Billion

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Embattled NFL star Michael Vick, who is already serving time on federal dogfighting charges, has been sacked again - this time by a $63,000,000,000 lawsuit.

The skinny: A South Carolina inmate who alleges the former Atlanta Falcons quarterback stole his pit bulls and sold them on eBay to buy missiles from Iran.

Jonathan Lee Riches filed the handwritten complaint over "theft and abuse of my animals" on July 23 in the U.S. District Court in Richmond, Virginia.

Riches alleges that Vick stole two white mixed pit bull dogs from his home in Holiday, Fla., and used them for dogfighting operations in Richmond.

The complaint alleges that Michael Vick sold the dogs in question on eBay and “used the proceeds to purchase missiles from the Iran government.”

Michael Vick is dogged everywhere these days. Including hilariously doctored photos.

The lawsuit goes on to allege that the disgraced athlete would need those missiles because he pledged allegiance to Al Qaeda in February of this year.

Michael Vick has to stop physically hurting my feelings and dashing my hopes,” Riches writes in the hilarious and insane, but heartfelt complaint.

Riches wants his $63 billion "backed by gold and silver" and delivered to the front gates to the Williamsburg Federal Correctional facility in South Carolina, where he resides as an inmate, serving out a wire fraud conviction.

Good thing they requested their $63 billion settlement be backed by gold and silver. Securities and bonds are just too risky in this economic climate.

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Michael Vick Biography

Michael Vick Photo
Michael Vick is the troubled, former quarterback of the Atlanta Falcons of the NFL, and a former All-American at Virginia Tech. The man... More »
Newport News, Virginia
Full Name
Michael Dwayne Vick