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Pity Tori Spelling. She only received $1 million or so after her father passed away.

And she doesn’t exactly look like Heidi Klum when pregnant.

So, what’s the former Beverly Hills, 90210 star to do in order to pick up her spirit – and her bank account? Hold a yard sale, of course! You can’t purchase Spelling’s virginity there, of course, because David Silver took that a long time ago.

Tori Spelling in 2021

But maybe you can pick up a cheap, early copy of Tori’s memoir. Or, apparently, lots of pornography.

Sadly, we don’t know anything about a Tori Spelling sex tape, so that may not be an item on the lot. Perhaps Jessica Simpson will have a yard sale one day, though.