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According to Us Weekly, Nicole Richie has gained a few pounds, “by eating protein bars, drinking Progain energy shakes prescribed by a holistic physician and working out twice a week to build muscle.”

Seriously. A magazine wrote that. Richie will be eating protein bars and working out right around the time Kevin Federline gets off his lazy, freeloading ass and gets a job. But she must have actually eaten something, because she now looks like a standard Hollywood anorexic, rather than an impoverished, freakish she-goblin from another galaxy. See below.