Kim Kardashian is not married to Kanye West. Heck, she's legally still married to Kris Humphries.
But in the latest issue of New York, the giant pair of breasts talks as if she and West will absolutely, positively be together for the rest of their lives. Or at least until they're 80 years old.
"When this whole life is done, and it's just the two of us sitting somewhere when we're 80, you want to have things to talk about that you have in common," Kardashian says. "I think that's something maybe I didn't value as highly as a quality I cared about in someone."
Well, no. When Kim looked at Kris, she didn't see rocking chairs on a porch. She saw Benjamins in her bank account.
So, what do Kardashian and West actually have in common?
"If I have a design meeting, or he has one, we come back and talk about how our meetings went," she says, making it clear that business still comes first. "It's cool, cause you can definitely get more in-depth with someone who actually knows what you're talking about."
As for the rumors that swirl around Kim and Kanye - are they getting hitched? Having a baby? Is the relationship just a PR stunt? - Kardashian concludes that she has learned to brush all the chatter off.
"I used to be so involved with what's going on around, what's up with this person. I just really truly feel so much more calm now, and I just don't care."
Hey, then we have something in common, too, Kim! We don't care about you, either.