Kim Zolciak Laments Shift in Formerly Robust Sex Life With Kroy Biermann as RV Breaks Down

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Last year, Bravo celebrity Kim Zolciak Biermann got a nice raise and her hit series Don't Be Tardy was renewed.

But all is not well in Zolciak-Biermann Land.

Don't Be Tardy - stranded RV 01

On this week's episode, the outspoken celeb got on her husband's case about how they have no sex life these days. 

Oh yes. Disaster struck on Don't Be Tardy this week.

And by "disaster," we of course mean a moderate inconvenience that happened to a family of attractive millionaires.

Don't Be Tardy - stranded RV 02

Their massive RV or bus or whatever that behemoth of a portable dwelling is called broke down ... in a parking lot. At 4AM.

It wasn't just any parking lot, either.

Honestly, for a couple of years I've wanted to see a horror film where the main characters are all either producing or starring on a reality show before they end up in a scary small town. But we digress.

Don't Be Tardy - stranded RV 03

While the Zolciak-Biermann scenario from this week fit that premise to a T, there were (sadly?) no knife-wielding cultists.

Just an empty, spooky parking lot.

Small towns can be genuinely threatening for many people, from sundown towns to remote areas where there's just no one around to help.

Don't Be Tardy - stranded RV 04

But homogenous communities are dangerous for marginalized people traveling alone.

A rich white family traveling with a production crew is not realistically in any danger.

During the shenanigans of trying to will the bus into working, Kroy was trying to start the engine.

Don't Be Tardy - stranded RV 05

"Please," Kroy begged, perhaps trying to coax some sympathy out of the engine.

He begged: "Just give it to me, please."

Like so many of us, Kim took the opportunity to make a sex joke.

Unlike most of us, the joke that she made was kind of sad.

Don't Be Tardy - stranded RV 06

"You give it to me," Kim jabbed.

"We have no love life."

This might seem like an unkind thing to expose on television ... or in front of anyone, really. But given that they both shared a laugh, it appears to have all been in good fun.

Don't Be Tardy - stranded RV 08

In on the joke, Kroy fired back: "That's not what you said this morning."

Kim kept the ball rolling, replying: "I wish."

In light of their current situation, Kroy joked:

"At 4AM, in this parking lot."

Don't Be Tardy - stranded RV 07

Kim let out a delighted laugh, at which point Kroy returned to the task of fixing their massive vehicle ... well, or trying.

Now, I'm no car expert - I identify them by color, not make or model (and I'm not clear on the difference between "make" and "model") - but the show did its best to explain the duo's problem.

They went on to discover that the culprit was a loose wire.

Don't Be Tardy - stranded RV 09

Soon, they were back on teh road and heading to a dude ranch, which may sound like a male strip club but is a cattle ranch that has been converted into a vacation spot.

It's unclear if there was any seriousness in Kim's jab.

Sometimes jokes are about real concerns.

Other times, they're just jokes.

Kim Zolciak, Red Solo Selfie

But it's perfectly normal for busy parents to find that they don't have as much time to bone each other as they would like.

Of course, we imagine that this is especially the case when a large family is packed onto a single bus.

There's not a ton of privacy on an RV.

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Kim Zolciak, Kroy Biermann
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Kim Zolciak Biography

Brielle Biermann, Ariana Biermann, and Kim Zolciak in April 2021
Kim Zolciak is an outspoken cast member on The Real Housewives of Atlanta. She really doesn't get along with NeNe Leakes at all. She... More »
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Kim Zolciak