We all love those "celebrities read mean tweets" segments that Jimmy Kimmel does. Honestly, we sometimes wonder if some of the hateful tweets are really just attempts to get on TV.
Well, to celebrate Jimmy Kimmel’s birthday, the show put together mean tweets about Jimmy Kimmel — giving him a taste of his own medicine — and had his various celebrity friends read them to him.
There are a lot of gems, here. But what might be the best one is Kim Kardashian reading a mean tweet about Jimmy … written by Kanye West.
Ray Romano is Kimmel’s birthday guest, and the tweet that he read was:
"Jimmy Kimmel needs a kick to his d–k hole."
That would take some impressive aim.
Michael Keaton, one of those rare actors who’s played both a superhero and supervillain (Batman and also The Vulture), read the first of many tweets that shame Jimmy’s appearance.
"I thought I saw Jimmy Kimmel @ Home Depot. Turns out it was just a sloppy dude with big dimples."
That’s not actually one of the meaner ones.
Halle Berry, who is looking jaw-droppingly gorgeous as always, reads:
"@jimmykimmel you are a jackass d–k sucker keep your mouth shut and do your little Tv show or get the f–k out of our country."
That bit of nuanced opinionating sounds political in nature.
Blackish star (and former Law & Order star) Anthony Anderson shared a strangely introspective hateful tweet:
"@jimmykimmel you represent everything I hate about myself. You bloated douche bag."
Controversial radio host Howard Stern jumps in, after wondering how he managed to get roped into doing this bit:
"Is Jimmy Kimmel crosseyed or just ridiculously ugly?"
He dismisses that particular mean tweet as "stupid." He’s right.
David Spade seems a little too enthusiastic as he reads:
"@jimmykimmel go suck a gorilla d–k u dumb fatass."
Honestly, all that we can think about when we see David Spade is his feud with Danielle Bregoli.
Chris Hemsworth reads a backhanded compliment, though he’s distracting in his handsomeness … and in that he trips over one word.
"@jimmykimmel is a comedy god. Like a deformed, lame, hideous god, such as ancient Greece’s Hephaestus. But that ugly bozo was still a god."
As you’ll see in the video below, Chris really struggles with the name Hephaestus. Way more than anyone should, since most people learn about the Olympians in elementary school. Maybe not in Australia?
(Since Thor: Ragnarok was absolutely incredible and probably the best MCU film to date, we’ll give Chris a pass on that)
Speaking of stars of excellent media, Kristen Bell reads a tweet that body-shames Jimmy Kimmel in more ways than one:
"@jimmykimmel R u kidding me w that flabby body? What the f–k – get 2 the gym man. Do u really shave ur pits??? Scary!"
That’s rude. Also hair-removal doesn’t have to be gender-based.
(You know she’s starring on The Good Place, which was so good that I binged the first season in one day … whoops)
Jon Stewart, who’s not doing much recently other than getting roasted by Kathy Griffin on Twitter over his response to the Louis C.K. revelations, reads:
"Jimmy Kimmel is that same fat kid from Win Ben Stein’s Money who grew up to become that fat kid from Win Ben Stein’s Money."
Larry David’s might be the funniest (as you’ll see, he just about loses it) but also one of the meanest:
"This is going to sound fantastic, but I forgot Jimmy Kimmel’s name so I googled ‘Ugly late night talk show host’ and I got him, top link."
There are plenty of others, including actors Liam Neeson and Jennifer Lawrence and convicted rapist Mike Tyson.
But who really got our attention was Kim Kardashian.
Most of these stars were reading tweets from random, quasi-anonymous internet strangers.
Kim Kardashian, however, was reading a tweet from a fellow celebrity … who is also her husband.
Kanye West’s words, as read by Kim:
"JIMMY KIMMEL PUT YOURSELF IN MY SHOES … OH NO THAT MEANS YOU WOULD HAVE GOTTEN TOO MUCH GOOD P—Y IN YOUR LIFE."
Kim seems to think that it’s a fair point.
Watch the full video below!