90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After? Season 5 has come to an end with Part 3 of the Tell All special.
The Tell All saw Angela blow up at Michael over his continuing hopes to have a child.
Tania and Syngin are the first to admit that they're not seeing eye to eye on this subject either.
Larissa and Eric faced off with the woman who had tattled to Larissa about Eric badmouthing her after their September 2019 breakup.
Jess unveiled her hot new man ... with a huge surprise for the cast.
Kalani has no idea what lies in store for her troubled marriage.
Angela stuns everyone, including Michael, with her plans to undergo dramatic weight loss surgery -- over Michael's strenuous objections.
Angela Deem and Michael Ilesanmi
Where we left off at Part 2 of the Tell All, Angela had smacked her table so hard that her camera was pointing up, outraged after Michael suggested having children "the other way." While that may sound like a plug for one of the many other 90 Day Fiance spinoffs, to Angela, it only meant one thing.
Is Michael demanding a second wife?
Angela certainly thinks so, and Michael protests and tries to explain ... to no avail, because Angela will not stop talking over him. Well, yelling over him.
Aunt Lydia gets involved
Angela is truly beyond parody as she doubles down on not having to do anything that Lydia says because she's an American. There are so many ways to discuss what to take and leave from various cultures in an intercontinental marriage. Angela bypasses all of the diplomacy and nuance and holds up her American status as a, dare we say it, "trump card."
The culture clash is real
As Angela accuses Lydia of being disrespectful, we are once again reminded that Angela repeatedly claims to "respect" Nigerian culture without showing any evidence of that. No one (outside of Michael's family) is expecting her to be submissive to him, but we are left to wonder what part of Michael's culture will be part of their lives?
Not even Aunt Lydia asks this
Instead, she just repeats the same absolute nonsense about gender roles and submission. It's important to remember that Lydia vs Angela isn't a "good guy, bad guy" conflict, it's a conflict between two women who are both wrong in their own ways -- Lydia for how she wants Angela to be treated, Angela for how she treats Lydia. And by the way, the fact that "Aunt Lydia" is the one preaching that Michael should have a child and that Angela should submit feels like such a Handmaid's Tale reference ... but she's a real person.
Angela flips out
Upon seeing Lydia smirk, she seems to strike the camera, getting up and storming away from the computer.
But she didn't go far
Skyla was just in the next room, so we see Angela storming and of course hear her continue to yell with rage. Super healthy behavior.
Michael can finally get a word in
With Angela gone, he explains that he's not talking about directly knocking up some other woman, second wife or otherwise, but undergoing IVF or adoption. Angela returns and is calmer -- for her -- telling Michael that $200,000 is just not a reasonable amount to pay for IVF and that he if he wants that, he can crowdfund it from his family. This is going nowhere.
Others kind of weigh in
It's hard to say without seeing the raw, uncut footage that may have been left out, but it sounds like a lot of the castmates are a little scared of Angela. At least, we can assume that this is why people weren't calling her out more. Kalani does point out that she sees parallels in Asuelu's culture and in Michael's, so she hopes that Michael will be a better fit than Asuelu has been.
Where do they go from here?
Still fuming after working herself up, Angela suggests that she and Michael may need to get a divorce because he becomes a different person around Lydia. We ... did not really see that. Fortunately, this is not the last that we see of them in this episode, so viewers are not left hanging.
Tania Maduro and Syngin Colchester
These two said most of what they had to say last time, but Shaun asks them about their plans with regard to having kids. Keep in mind that they're still trying to figure out if they will remain married. They're good people who clearly love each other, but love is not always enough.
They go back and forth
Then, Syngin says that he doesn't see himself having kids. Tania seems visibly shocked by this declaration.
Jess speaks up
She points out that it's not great to see Tania find this out now, that Syngin should be honest with her.
Angela says to hold out hope
In her opinion, Tania can just needle at Syngin until she gets her way. That's Angela's strategy -- to force her man to come around to her way of thinking. Tania and Syngin laugh politely at this suggestion, but hopefully they both know that hoping that the other magically changes is not the key to the relationship. If time with Syngin has not taught this to Tania, perhaps nothing will.
Larissa Lima and Eric Nichols
This time, Shaun is going to ask the two some uncomfortable questions ... and she has quite the surprise in store.
How are things for Larissa's legal status?
The question of her residency is ongoing, but she says that she doesn't have any news. This was of course recorded before Larissa's harrowing detention by ICE on September 19.
Eric pulls QUITE the stunt
He starts to get down on one knee and FAKE PROPOSES to Larissa before announcing that he was merely kidding. Everyone is uncomfortable.
Then, Shaun brings them back to this
The moment when, after moving in with Eric, Larissa spoke on the phone to Nathalie, a woman to whom he had badmouthed Larissa in Colorado.
Eric plays it down
He does admit to having said unkind things about Larissa post-breakup, but he insists that he didn't share too many details.
Nathalie joins the Tell All
She says that it is heartbreaking to her that Larissa is still with Eric and even defending him after the way that he spoke about her post-breakup.
"Your mouth is like a toilet seat lid," says to Nathalie while clapping his hands. "You were delivered to my parents' house like a pizza."
Nathalie calls out Eric Nichols, faces off with Larissa Lima
"You cannot do s--t, Nathalie," Larissa announces to the camera. "You are nobody." At this point, Nathalie laughs: "You have proven to the world that you are a dumbass, period. You have proven to the world that you don't care about yourself as a woman." Wow. Meanwhile, Eric also says that Debbie and Colt were like "piranhas" who cast a spell on him to make him speak ill about Larissa during the visit. Oh boy.
Angela is appalled
To her, if what Nathalie says about Eric is true, it was a massive violation for an ex to badmouth a woman to anyone.
So why did Larissa stick with him?
Larissa explains that she was raised Catholic and is still Catholic and as such, she believes that there is a power in forgiveness. There are some limits, however. Larissa admits that she will never forgive Colt.
She is rejoicing because she will never again have to interact with Vanessa, Colt, or Debbie.
She found the man of her dreams. She began dating a new man five months after dumping Colt's cheating, lying ass. And this one's a total hottie.
She owes Debbie a thank you
After all, if Debbie had not deliberately sabotaged Colt's relationship, Jess might have taken longer to see him for the liar that he is. And then she might not have been able to meet her guy.
Meet her upgrade!
Jess brings Brian Hanvey into the picture. Jess and Larissa both scored major hotties after ditching Colt ... making us wonder if he's some sort of good luck charm?
Jess and Brian aren't just dating
Jess reveals that she and Brian are MARRIED. Now, we here at THG knew this and reported it in early September, but this was still a stunning development for countless viewers.
"She got her Green Card," Debbie quips.
Again, there is no evidence that Jess was just looking for a Green Card. She could get that from, well, just about anyone, because she's hot and fun. If she'd been fishing for a Green Card, she wouldn't have been upset about Colt's lies and cheating, she would have just gone "nice, all of the times when he's cheating will mean less acting for me to do." The fact that Brian is a ridiculous hottie also means that this was about desire, not residency.
He also actually cares about her
While it's not clear if Colt fully appreciates that women are their own people with feelings and emotions -- based upon his behavior, he seems to think that he's entitled to lie to them if it benefits him in some way -- Brian combines great sex with actually caring about Jess.
As for Colt
He says that he feels like he dodged two bullets with Larissa and Jess. Fortunately, more and more fans are seeing through his "gosh, I'm just a little awkward" facade. Soon, maybe Debbie will be the only one who doesn't see her son as a reality TV villain.
Shaun Robinson asks what everyone sees in their futures
Larissa emphasizes that she's here in the US to support her kids and that this is her American dream.
Angela is about to undergo weight loss surgery
She was reluctant to admit it for reasons that are about to become apparent, but she's going to undergo surgery to lose over 100 pounds in three months, and following that, she'll have plastic surgery to deal with her excess skin.
"No, no," Michael objects
He doesn't like cosmetic surgeries or anything fake, he loves her the way that she is, and he worries about the consequences. Larissa cheers on Angela's decision but does confirm that there is a risk of death with any surgery.
Angela tells Michael to look at the positives
He can't stop her, so he should look forward to their future sex life. She boasts "I'll flip you upside down." We're not entirely sure what that means, but we don't think that she means this literally. We also don't think that she's talking about pegging.