Cynthia Nixon, denying rumors she got her breasts done after shooting Sex and the City: “We got a call from the [New York] Post (the paper that ran the story) asking if I’d had a breast augmentation, and my publicist laughed at them and said, ‘No, of course not.’ But they printed it anyway. If I was going to get a boob job, wouldn’t it make sense that I’d get it before Sex and And the The City (the movie)?”
The problem with the term ???beautiful girl??? is that girls are rarely, if ever, beautiful. Girls are pretty and girls are cute ??? and that???s fine because there???s a time and place for cute (the age 16 and prom, respectively) ??? but they???re not beautiful. Women are beautiful. Women are sexy.
We???re reminded of how many people ignore that important distinction around this time every year: the lad mag ???Hot List??? season, when Maxim et al group together the names of every sad, drunk, Botoxed, sutured, bleached, commodified and infected girl in Hollywood and try to pretend the resultant stable has sex appeal. We???re sick of it, so we???ve compiled our own lineup of truly beautiful women.
How do you get four feuding co-stars to appear in the same magazine when they don’t even want to be in the same room with each other? Shoot four different covers!
That’s the nefarious raison d’etre we’re drawing for why Marie Claire chose to put each of the Sex and the City ladies, seen here pretending to get along, on their own cover for the magazine’s July issue, which coincides with the movie’s release. Life & Style says the ladies were all part of the same April 9 photoshoot, but only Sarah Jessica Parker’s cover will be on newsstands — Cynthia Nixon, Kim Cattrall, and Kristin Davis’ covers will be sent only to subscribers.
Which means even if you do subscribe to Marie Claire, you’ll only be able to score one cover in your mailbox and the SJP edition on the newsstand, so expect a BOOMING black market on eBay!
Cynthia Nixon goes from playing the angry redhead (a.k.a. the one who gets chlamydia!) on Sex and the City to picking used Ziploc bags out of the public trash receptacle to donning a giant Seuss-inspired hat and reading the most monotonous children’s story of all time to an unappreciative audience of spoiled brats at TheatreworksUSA.
And you thought your job prospects sucked.
Hey, remember in the series finale of Sex and the City, when Miranda catches Steve’s alcoholic mother roaming the streets and eating pizza straight out of the garbage can?
What are we saying, of course you do! It was one of those shocking/pivotal moments when we realized Steve’s mom had fully transitioned from drunk Irish hag to Crazy Homeless Person, and wondered whether Miranda loved Steve enough to throw his deranged parent in the tub and hand-wash her naked, wrinkly body. (Turns out, she did!)
Anyhow, for some reason or another, that particular SATC moment came to mind this morning when we were sifting through the gossip pages. No, not while we were reading about Christopher Hitchens’ latest crazy-person rant, but rather when we saw this bizarre item about how Cynthia Nixon was rooting through a trash can at Riverside Park.
More specifically, how Nixon reportedly picked some woman’s Ziploc bag out of the trash receptacle, asked “is it okay to take this?” and then “took her son’s half-eaten snack and placed it in [the woman’s] used baggie.”
This week’s New York magazine features an interview with Cynthia Nixon, which is title Educating Cynthia, but is promoted on the New York Metro site with the catch “Formally Known as Miranda.”
Within the context of the article (in which Nixon uses tons of big words and is still described as “girlish”) the writer of the piece lays out a typical “lunch with a New York celeb” scene. The waitress walks up to Nixon and Emily Nussbaum, hand them the menus, and begins rambling about her awe and admiration (described as “gushing”) of Nixon’s career.
She remembers back in 1984, hearing about the then-18-year-old actress???s breakthrough accomplishment, when she appeared on Broadway in two productions simultaneously: Tom Stoppard???s The Real Thing and David Rabe???s Hurlyburly. ???You???re the reason I came to New York,??? she concludes, beaming.
???Thank you,??? Nixon responds. She???s gracious and she???s direct, but she doesn???t engage. And then she snaps right back to our discussion without further comment.
Burn! We’re sure that waitress/aspiring actress felt just fabulous about her idol’s reaction. If she’s formally known as Miranda, were going to take a shot and assume Nixon is currently known as “Huge Bitch.”
Educating Cynthia [Emily Nussbaum, New York Magazine]
• Cynthia Nixon continues her trend of milking her merits as an actress. New York continues to wish she would just go back to being Miranda. (Wed. 9/20-10/8) [NYM]
• Sometimes just saying “our world is totally fucked up” isn’t enough. Allow Matthew Ritchie to express this to you in art form. (Thurs. 9/21) [Andrea Rosen Gallery]
• Moby must have lost his mind when he stopped e-mailing. He wants everyone to go dance with him in the Park. (Fri. 9/22) [Ultra New York]
• MoMa???s newest film exhibit confirms what everyone’s been telling you all along: you are totally obsessed with yourself. (Sat. 9/23) [MoMa]
• Even though they each take up one quarter of a normal person’s space, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen still need to RSVP to Fashion Week. [Gatecrasher]
• Graydon Carter attends a Cathy Horyn-less Carolina Herrera fashion show, but was not thinking about fashion. Well, at least that means he won’t write a terrible review. [FBNY]
• Before they figure out how Anna Nicole Smith’s son died, maybe they should they figure out where he died. [People]
• This year, Anna Wintour is taking a somewhat hands-off approach when it comes to Fashion Week. Well, that, or she’s sweet on a British tennis pro. [Lowdown]
• We bet Sarah Jessica Parker doesn’t take the subway. [Page Six]
It wouldn’t be a Sex and the City birthday bash without Kim Cattrall, but it was the invoking of her name and not Sammy Jo’s presence that caused the most stir at Sarah Jessica Parker’s 40th birthday bash. Says Cynthia Nixon: “I have nothing to do – thanks to Kim.”
Well, there’s always ripping up the carpet with Christine Marinoni.