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Despite all of those hope-inspiring split rumors about Asuelu Pulaa and Kalani Faagata, some things remain unclear.

Yes, he referred to himself as “single,” but he and Kalani have misled fans before.

He is still under NDA, so many topics are off-limits until 90 Day Fiance gives the go-ahead.

Asuelu can, at least, talk about one thing: admitting that he’s not a good dad.

“I’m not a good father,” Asuelu Pulaa confessed in the caption of a recent Instagram video.

“But,” he claimed, “I’m trying my best.”

Asuelu tagged his caption “#emotionaldamage.”

It is entirely possible that Asuelu really is putting in an effort to be a good father.

Perhaps he is even trying to be a good partner to Kalani.

However, the saccharine video and the self-pitying caption seem designed to manipulate followers.

In fact, it would be easier to believe Asuelu if he had not posted this hamfisted ploy for attention.

Almost anyone, even some of the worst dads on the planet, can use social media to make themselves look good.

No one thinks that Asuelu is one of the worst dads on the planet, or even on the 90 Day Fiance franchise, so why use this tactic?

The answer may be simple: Asuelu wants sympathy.

There are few faster ways to elicit praise and compliments than making a self-deprecating remark.

Asuelu knows it, and it is all but impossible to imagine that this was not his aim.

Even if his words are sincere, he clearly aims to tug at followers’ heartstrings.

Asuelu may also be reflecting upon his own shortcomings and that of his own childhood.

That could be what he meant by “emotional damage.”

Kalani is relaxing for a bit while Asuelu tries to wrangle the kids and food prep. It goes … okay, at least. The idea is for Asuelu to demonstrate that he can help with the kids, since he’s also their parent.

Maybe.

We would like to imagine that Asuelu and Kalani are seeing a therapist.

They could work through their relationship problems.

However, backstage, Lesina — who says almost nothing the entire Tell All — laments that Asuelu is simply “weak.” She sounds open to forgiving Asuelu for loving his wife.

Asuelu could examine why he behaves the way that he does. It would be great!

But that fantasy hinges upon his willingness to work on himself.

Remember, in the past, Asuelu was adamant that they go and see a male couples counselor.

Asuelu Pulaa Reveals INSANE Amount of Money He's Sent to His Mom: Sorry Kalani!

In his mind, a woman would automatically side with Kalani.

Asuelu’s approach to their relationship issues has involved … mischief.

To put it bluntly, Asuelu has tried to use Samoan heritage to assert control.

Asuelu speaks of his dream for Kalani to move to Samoa for a few years to “see what Samoan women do in the family.” In Samoa, he says, women take care of the kids and clean the house while the men go out and hunt or fish. His goal is transparently obvious, and no one thinks that this is an innocuous cultural exchange.

Many cultures in the world have included injustice and inequality.

That does not make it right.

Asuelu should love his wife enough to want to be her partner, not her master.

Asuelu then starts suggesting that Kalani, whose father is Samoan, is not a “real” Samoan girl, not because of her heritage but because she is not obedient to his wishes, doesn’t want to have a lot of kids, and doesn’t want to defer to his mother. She claps back, reminding him that his wife and both of his children are American, and she’s already Samoan.

It would be amazing if our next update from this couple brings good news.

Maybe they have resolved a lot of problems. Or perhaps they have separated, as hints suggest.

Either way, it would be an improvement from just being miserable together.