Colt Johnson Proposes to Side-Piece-Turned-Girlfriend Vanessa Guerra

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All season long on 90 Day: The Single Life, fans were teased that Colt Johnson would propose.

It was fairly obvious that he was going to propose to Vanessa Guerra.

But he and his former sidepiece, now girlfriend have only been officially dating for about a month.

Colt's premature proposal was awkward. The response that followed was even more so.

Colt Johnson proposal to Vanessa Guerra 01

Following a serious chat on the previous episode, Colt told Vanessa to meet him on the walkway above the lake.

He went to the car, ostensibly to stash their picnic gear.

In reality, Colt's aim was to retrieve the engagement ring from the door of the car.

Colt Johnson proposal to Vanessa Guerra 02

Colt is going to propose.

Despite a lot of issues, including the fact that they've only been "official" for weeks, he feels that it's "now or never."

He worries that Vanessa might say no, noting that this would break his heart.

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"Are you happy?" Colt asks Vanessa, who answers in the affirmative.

Of course, she's talking about their mini-vacation to the lake.

Either Vanessa is an excellent actress, or she truly does not expect the proposal.

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Colt tells her that he cannot imagine spending the rest of his life without her.

They tell each other that they love each other.

And then Colt drops to one knee, prompting Vanessa ... to burst into laughter.

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Vanessa giggles, asking "what the f--k" Colt is doing.

Despite her disbelief, she soon realizes that he is serious and manages to put on a straight face.

"Will you marry me, Vanessa?" Colt asks while holding up the ring.

Colt Johnson proposal to Vanessa Guerra 06

"Stick your finger out!" Colt barks, then sliding the ring onto her finger.

The ring is a little tight but only a little.

Colt then stands. The whole "kneeling" tradition was clearly invented when people got married in their early 20s.

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"We have all these problems," Vanessa points out.

"We're going to have problems throughout our entire life, I promise," Colt replies.

"But I promise you we can work through them," he adds.

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Colt asks Vanessa to say "yes" and agree to be his wife.

He gets half of that.

Vanessa says yes, after a lot of prompting and extended periods of awkward silence that were likely exaggerated by editing.

Colt Johnson proposal to Vanessa Guerra 09

“I want to marry you some day, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to,” Vanessa tells Colt.

“I really want to see that you’re consistent and that you’re not gonna f–k around," she explains.

Vanessa adds: "I want to make sure that this is you for good.”

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Colt agrees to that.

He even correctly notes that this is why the concept of an engagement still exists in modern times.

Maybe not specifically for compulsive cheaters, but more generally for couples where the love is real but there is still uncertainty.

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Vanessa does say that it could be a year or more before she's ready to tie the knot.

Colt agrees to her terms, telling her that she's worth it.

Whether she's dragging things out in hopes of returning to the show or for her own sake ... well, who says it can't be both?

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So, Colt's first season on The Single Life isn't looking very single.

As they leave, Vanessa gloats that her engagement ring is nicer than that given to his ex-wife, Larissa Lima.

That may be true, but since Colt provided both rings, doesn't that say more about him than anything else?

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