For the first time, Dorinda Medley is confirming being fired by Bravo.
It's a shame, too, she says -- because she'd been hoping for a redemption arc.
This week, Dorinda Medley was a guest on Bethenny Frankel's Just B podcast.
Taking in her (for now) final season of The Real Housewives of New York, Dorinda is the first to admit that she "did not have a good season this year."
She is not alone in that assessment ... but not everyone understands why she was in such a foul mood all season.
Dorinda emphasized to Bethenny that she is "not going to make excuses for it."
"But," she explains, "I was doing real."
"You know, that's where I was at that time," Dorinda continues. That sounds appropriate, given the name of the franchise.
Dorinda confessed to Andy that she had felt "overwhelmed" when they spoke at the Season 12 Reunion special.
In fact, in retrospect, she has come to believe that she should have taken off Season 12.
To Bethenny, she reiterates that this would have been the wiser choice.
Bethenny, of course, left the show right before Season 12 began airing, back in August 2019.
"I'll be honest with you, I felt very, very scared going into the season," Dorinda expresses.
She felt scared "because not only was my life very intense with all the things ..."
Dorinda lists those frightening things: "... you know, the house, my father, broken rib, breaking up with John [Mahdessian]."
"It was like, wow. ... I'm not putting any blame," she notes, "but you know, when you left, I was really in a mode of coming back and being a powerful couple."
"Then, you know, I came back and I was sort of a toothpick in an ocean," Dorinda laments.
"I didn't get my voice out correctly," Dorinda freely acknowledges.
Bethenny cannot help but agree.
"And you get in over your skis," she tells her friend. "You drink, something happens, you say something."
"And then you're in your head about what you just said," Bethenny notes, "but the show must go on,"
"You're still filming, there's still cameras," Bethenny explains. "So that's what is challenging, and that's where I do feel you."
She notes that, in most cases, Housewives who screw up get a comeback.
"And, listen, everybody always gets their resurrection season," Bethenny suggests.
"So the next season, the person is super cautious," she describes, "they got burned, everything they did wrong the season before ... "
But if Dorinda gets a resurrection season, it won't be Season 13.
Dorinda confesses that she had really been "looking forward to coming back this year."
She had hoped to have a redemption arc.
Dorinda could have that now, because she is "in a good place."
"Listen, I had a rough season, but that's what we do as Housewives," she states.
"We have good seasons," Dorinda acknowledges. "We have bad seasons."
"We come back and we change it up," she adds.
"And listen, I was looking forward to coming back this year," Dorinda affirms.
She expresses: "I was looking forward to having that moment."
Notably, this is the first time that she has actually confirmed that, yes, Bravo didn't ask her back.
"I was ready to go back, I was excited to go back, I was planning to back," Dorinda confirms.
"And I thought I would have a great year," she says, "I wasn't given that option."
Not all Housewives admit when Bravo gives them the axe.
"They're calling it a pause, which I don't really ... for me, I'm an old-fashioned girl," Dorinda characterizes herself.
For analogy, she offers: "If you're not waitressing and getting paid, you're not waitressing."
"At the end of the day, it was a mutual 'no,'" Dorinda states.
Dorinda says that, ultimately, this was for the best.
"It's released me to do other things," she notes.
Dorinda concludes: "It's put me in a really much saner place."