Jinger Duggar will be forced to reflect on her most painful personal experience tonight.
On the latest episode of Counting On, the 26-year old will look back on the tragedy that befell her and husband Jeremy last fall... when they lost their child to a miscarriage.
“Recently we had announced to my family the news that we were expecting,” Jinger says in one scene from the installment, adding in detail;
“That night, I started having some concerning signs. During the middle of the night I started waking up and having more and more spotting and it was not normal.”
Sadly, it didn't take the doctors long to determine what happened.
“We went in and they tried to check for a heartbeat, but they couldn’t find one," she said. "They did an ultrasound and said that we had lost the baby."
Just like Jinger, Joy-Anna Duggar also experienced a miscarriage in 2019, giving the loved ones something truly horrific to bond over.
And yet: The shared experience doesn't make it any easier for Jinger to remember.
The same goes for Jeremy, oof course.
"It was very difficult for us, the timing. It was sudden, and we had just announced to our family and it hit us hard," Vuolo says on the episode.
Thankfully, however, couple announced in May that they are expecting a baby girl.
Talk about a miraculous turrnaround, right?!?
“We are so excited,” Jinger told People Magazine at the time.
“Felicity is going to have to have a sister. Everything looks great with the baby. We're so thankful. Had a lot of check-ups and we’re just really, really excited."
Despite the excitement over this joyous development, Jinger couldn't help but think of the baby she lost as well.
On Instagram, the veteran reality star opened up about her wide range of emotions in the wake of this rainbow baby news.
"The overwhelming feelings of joy and anticipation that I’m feeling today are a sharp reminder of the overwhelming feelings of sadness and loss I felt last November," she wrote.
"On a Monday evening, Jer and I were rejoicing with our families as we announced that I was pregnant.
"Yet, in God’s perfect timing, it was the next morning that I awoke knowing something wasn’t right."
She proceeded to delve into more detail this past spring...
Within moments I knew that I’d lost the baby. Tears filled my eyes, sadness cloaked my soul.
Having just lost my grandmother months before, the news of new life was like spring lilies blossoming after a dark, cold winter.
And in a moment, that life was gone.
I know many of you can relate. The minutes feel like hours, the hours like days, don’t they? I was helpless—nothing I could do would restore the lost life. Yet, I was never hopeless.
This is how Jinger concluded back then:
In those moments, I did the only thing I could. I rehearsed the timeless truths upon which I’ve anchored my soul—the truth that God is sovereign and he is good.
The truth that Job recited, thousands of years ago, in his agony: “The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.”
The pain doesn’t leave quickly. It’s not meant to. But in the midst of pain, the hope we hold is in God who works “all things together for good for those who love him and are called according to his purpose” (Rom 8:28).
Dear friends, the reality is, at times we are helpless. But never, and I mean never, do we have to be hopeless.
Counting On airs Tuesdays at 9/8c on TLC.
This sounds like an especially emotional episode of the series.