Ever since Meghan Markle married Prince Harry, there have been rumors about the former actress struggling to fit in with the royals.
These reports were inevitable of course, but they've been somewhat more vicious and persistent than we anticipated.
Insiders (or people purporting to be insiders, or tabloid columnists writing as imaginary insiders) claim that Meghan has breached royal protocol several times in her six weeks as a Duchess.
Naturally, these folks insist that the Queen is not happy with Meg's performance thus far.
Kate Middleton, on the other hand, is reportedly loving every minute of it.
A source tells the never-reliable Star magazine that Kate has been “gleefully watching Meghan’s blunders from the sidelines.”
Those blunders include such egregious offenses as wearing a dress that didn't cover her shoulders.
Oh, and let's not forget the time that Meghan tried to hold Harry's hand in public!
We're still clutching our pearls over that one.
Apparently, Kate is supposed to be helping Meghan out with all this confusing nonsense, but when the time came to lend a hand to her fellow lapsed peasant, she was all like, nah:
“You’d think that as a fellow commoner, she’d be sympathetic to how Meghan is struggling, but Kate feels threatened by Meghan’s popularity,” the insider reveals.
“Kate takes potshots at Meghan every chance she gets and makes a point to tell the queen about all the things Meghan is doing wrong.”
Oh, what we would give to hear Kate flex that stiff upper lip to spit some royal zingers.
"Ay bish, you used to be on Suits but you couldn't find a tailor for that baggy-ass wedding dress?"
"I heard you were a model on Deal on No Deal. Maybe you should've said no deal to that fugly hat, nahmean?""
And so forth.
Anyway, it all sounds very far-fetched, but this isn't the first report we've heard that Kate and Meg aren't exactly beasties:
"Kate feels like Meghan has barely made any effort with her and is more interested in impressing [Queen Elizabeth],” a source recently told some tabloid called Closer Weekly.
"Kate feels left out. She spent years working on her image as 'the perfect royal,' and Meghan is stealing her thunder,"
Yes, a real feud might be taking place among the duchesses.
If only we could convince them to star in a reality show about their classy beef.