Jada Pinkett Smith, her mother, her daughter Willow, and her daughter’s best friend sat down to talk about sex.
Their no-holds-barred conversation includes Willow revealing that she walked in on her parents having sex without them ever knowing.
And Jada describes how her grandmother taught her about masturbation when she was just 9 years old — and why that was so important.
Red Table Talk is a gift and, frankly, better and more wholesome and intelligent and wise than anything that you’re going to get from most other programs.
There have been wild rumors about Jada’s sexual habits, but she’s opening up about the truth.
Jada reveals: "My grandmother taught me about self-pleasuring because she wanted me to know that that pleasure was from me."
She explains what she means by that.
“She didn’t want me to fall into the hands of a man," Jada says. "And if he gave me pleasure, to think that that was him."
That makes a lot of sense, actually. Not only is masturbation a healthy habit (both mentally and physically), but it can increase independent thinking.
"And she taught me at 9!"
That makes sense, too. A lot of parents are squeamish about having that sort of conversation, but some kids pick up the habit on their own at much younger ages.
Jada says that her teen years were full of a lot of self-pleasure.
"I think by your age, I gave myself multiples first."
Good for her!
Jada clarifies: "Multiple orgasms. I was really into it at one point."
She explains that she was at a place in life where she was not dating.
"Just because," Jada explains. "I was in an exploration state and I was abstaining from men."
She even refers to reaching a point where she decided to cool off.
"And I actually think I went through kind of an addiction, too, with it." Jada continues: "And then one day, I was like, ‘Enough. You’re having five orgasms a day.’"
Is there such a thing as too much of a good thing?
Jada starts off, however, by explaining why it is so important that she talk about sex with her daughter.
"If I have to sit up here and tell her that she has to be careful in these streets because of all the harm that may come to her because she’s a woman, I’m damn sure not leaving out the good stuff," Jada says.
That is an excellent point.
Willow chimes in.
"I feel like a lot of people make that mistake." Willow clarifies: "Of only telling their girls: ‘It’s scary out there. you better be safe.’"
It’s worth mentioning that when Willow says this, widening her eyes to be serious, her delivery perfectly mirrors her father’s.
With three generations of a family at the table, there are of course some generational topics that come up.
Willow and her best friend, Talena, say that they discuss sex and sexuality pretty frankly with each other.
For example, they even discuss grooming styles for pubic hair. That’s not really uncommon with teens who are comfortable with themselves and each other.
In contrast, Jada says that she doesn’t really think that she and her peers had those kinds of conversations.
Her mother, Adrienne Banfield-Jones, says that she certainly did not.
Jada hypothesizes that perhaps Willow and her friends are able to talk like this because they have access to more information.
Will and Jada are amazing parents, which anyone can see from how incredible and smart their children are.
Unfortunately, not everyone is going to agree with their attitudes. Some people see sex and sexuality, including masturbation, as something shameful or even somehow immoral.
This enduring cultural stigma will one day fade away. In the mean time, more parents will dance around the topic instead of having frank and honest discussions with their daughters.
And it may be that, as Jada’s grandmother feared, some of those daughters will associate pleasure exclusively with men and not develop any sexual independence.
That would be a real shame.