This week on an emotional Teen Mom OG Season 5 Episode 13, there was a paternity test, a heartbreaking medical crisis, and a whole new level of diva-like behavior from everyone's favorite reality star-turned-cam girl
Meanwhile, Maci met with a doctor to find new ways to manage her own health condition, and a producer made a trip to Austin.
You know what that means. #FireFarrah
But first, let's talk about the latest Teen Mom OG paternity test.
Obviously, we've seen quite a few such tests over the course of the show's history, but we think it's safe to say no one saw this latest storyline coming.
Of course, that's mostly just because Gary Shirley's dad isn't on anyone's radar.
Jody - Gary's "alleged father," as a nurse calls him at one point - is one of those aging f-ck ups that seems like he'd be fun to grab a beer with at your local dive bar.
But that doesn't mean you'd want him as your dad.
Jody reveals that while he was locked up on that day that Gary entered the world, he firmly believes that he is the father, as Maury would say.
At one point Gary asks who else might potentially be his dad, and Jody just gives a baffled shrug that basically amounts to a silent "yo mama" joke.
It's an intense situation, but let's be honest - no one tuned into last night's episode to find out the identity of Gary Shirley's father.
If you watch Teen Mom OG online, you know Farrah Abraham has been out of control for, well, as long as we can remember.
You probably also know that Farrah got fired and the press chalked it up to her ongoing cam girl career.
Well, this week's installment reminded us that producers had about one million legitimate reasons to kick Farrah to the curb, and her choice to continue getting naked on the internet was just one of them.
At one point Farrah became upset with producers - like, really, really upset - because she thought the set teacher (a California state law requirement) had given Sophia candy against her wishes.
As with so many conflicts involving Farrah, the situation escalated rapidly and underscored just how difficult it is to work with this woman.
As if that wasn’t enough, we were then treated to a montage of Farrah brutally mistreating the show’s production staff.
The producers are as baffled as the rest of us about Farrah’s decision to return to sex work, but as this episode reminds us, it's far from their only reason for wanting to cut ties with Farrah.
Elsewhere in the TMOG universe far more beloved cast members are dealing with far more serious problems.
Maci’s medical issues have doctors using terms like "ovarian drilling," which sounds downright terrifying.
Meanwhile, the Baltierras are dealing with the fallout from Catelynn's miscarriage - a heartbreaking development that's clearly shaken them both to their core.
“You’re beautiful; you’re smart; you’re strong."
That's both the poignant title of this week's episode and the mantra Cate uses to help her endure the trauma.
Tyler remains thoroughly supportive throughout, and clearly just wants what's best for his wife.
As difficult as it can be to watch, Catelynn’s might be the most important storyline the show has ever done, and we're not exaggerating when we say it might just save some lives.
Tyler’s reaction to Catelynn’s suicidal ideation served as a potent reminder that while he's not without his flaws, he's about as good as it gets when it comes to Teen Mom husbands.
Last night's episode may have ended with the dreaded words "to be continued..." but we don't think anyone would deny that this was an hour of drama that stood on its own as a testament to the power and potential of reality television.