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Monday on The Bachelor, Arie continued his quest to pare down the field / steal kisses from as many aspiring trophy wives as possible.

It’s a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it.

If you want to know who has the inside track, The Bachelor spoilers have you covered. Just saying. Follow the link if you dare.

Watch The Bachelor Season 22 Episode 2 Online
Watch The Bachelor Season 22 Episode 2 Online

Otherwise, if you choose to remain spoiler free, it’s a long road ahead before we find out who Arie picks. A long Journey, if you will. 

But that doesn’t mean it won’t be hella entertaining, or full of twists and turns that not even The Bachelor spoiler gods expect.

The drama ramped up this week thanks to the got the first one-on-one dates of the season, with Arie picking up Becca K. on a motorcycle.

Becca opened up about losing her father to brain cancer and being close with her family, and Arie gave her a rose in return.

Pretty standard.

The Bachelor: Rebecca

For his second one-on-one date, Arie took Krystal to his hometown of Scottsdale, Arizona. Yes, he took her home on night two;

Krystal even met Arie’s parents and brother, and it went well, despite her being thrown off by her own upbringing being less traditional.

After she received a rose and a private concert (another Bachelor staple), the episode devolved into a massive car wreck.

Literally. The participants on Arie’s demolition derby group date made for perhaps the largest group date in franchise history:

Maquel, Marikh, Tia, Valerie, Annaliese, Lauren G., Kendall, Bekah M., Jenny, Seinne, Jenna, Caroline, Brittany, Bibiana and Chelsea.

The Bachelor: Annaliese

Annaliese stole the show, or at least the other girls’ thunder, by claiming she suffered “bumper car trauma” as a kid and freaking out.

Producers (and the other women) had a field day with this at Annaliese’s expense, but she eventually did participate with the group.

Seinne won the demolition derby, and received a rose for that … along with her beauty and brains (she went to Yale, people)!

Bibiana, meanwhile, stormed off in a rage at the ensuing cocktail party after not getting any one-on-one time with Arie to speak of.

There’s one in every season.

The Bachelor: Krystal

Krystal pushed her over the edge a bit when she "stole" him during the cocktail party, even though she already had a rose of her own.

This never goes over well historically.

Bibiana tore Krystal a new one, accusing her of having a fake tone and worse. This sort of thing is what TV viewing dreams are made of.

Alas, Monday’s show was the end of the line for Jenny, Valerie and Lauren G., with the former going out in unique style at least.

Jenny told Arie: "I’m not sad about you."

"I’m sad about leaving my new friends.”

Aww. Isn’t that sweet? She may not have found love in the romantic sense, but the bond with her new girlfriends is forever!

Who said these women all have to swoon over some guy … or that they have to hate each other and fight all the time!?

Way to defy convention, Jenny.