Jessica Simpson: Check Out My 37-Year-Old Butt!

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Jessica Simpson is 37.

For our readers of a certain age, the fact that the bubbly blonde whose tuna-confusion helped make her an early MTV reality standout is now pushing 40 will be enough to provoke a mild existential crisis.

After all, though she's been in the spotlight forever, Jess certainly doesn't look 37 - as evidenced by her latest bikini pic:

Jessica Simpson: Bikini Birthday Photo

“Kiss My Butt 36," Simpson captioned her celebratory birthday shot, demonstrating that her brassy bravado and love of Random Capitalization remain intact.

If you follow her on Instagram, you know that Simpson posts bikini photos all the time, but this one has attracted an unusual amount of attention.

For one thing, Jessica looks damn good for any age.

On top of that, it seems fans of all ages, shapes, sizes, and genders seem to have been inspired by Jess' apparent ability to laugh in the face of Father Time.

"She's 37 now, guys. I just turned 37 one day prior, myself. And I concur; 36 can kiss my butt!" wrote one follower.

"I want her butt! I'm gonna do squats as we walk this weekend," commented another.

Jessica Simpson Swimsuit Image

"36?? Looking 24!" wrote a third, who ... we guess missed the whole 37th birthday part.

What may be most inspiring thing about Jess is the fact that she's not Gisele Bundchen  - out there burning extra calories by foraging for her dinner of twigs and berries.

(We kid. Gisele wouldn't be caught dead eating fruit! Sugar!)

Instead Jessica likes to drink, eat, and chill, and she's never been shy about it.

It's encouraging to know that one can maintain such a jaw-dropping figure without a superhuman, round-the-clock commitment to fitness.

Of course, this is the Internet in 2017, which means that where there's positivity, haters are soon to follow.

Jessica Simpson 2006 VMAs

Sadly, comments such as this gem have begun to pop up on Jess' awe-inspiring post:

"Idiot. Your kids suffer for your dumbness and needing attention NEGATIVE ATTENTION. BE A FREAKIN MOM!"

Yes, because a millionaire who gets to make her own work schedule obviously shouldn't have the time to go for a swim or post a selfie on her birthday.

Jess may have taken a lot of flak for her chicken-tuna comment back in the day, but as social media reminds us on a regular basis, there are much dumber folks in our midst.

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Jessica Simpson Biography

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Sweet mother of G-d, Jessica Simpson has got some huge breasts. Holy frickin' $h!t. Look at those things! She also possesses a singing... More »
Born
Birthplace
Abilene, Texas
Full Name
Jessica Ann Simpson

Jessica Simpson Quotes

They're just the cutest couple in the world. They are adorable. Anybody would wish to be them and you can only wish them well. Just being around them inspires love and everything I sing about.

Jessica Simpson [on her sister and Pete Wentz]

It’s fun to do a small film that might be released to DVD not because it’s a horrible film, but because it’s an independent film. For people to say Employee of the Month was a flop is ludicrous. We made the money back–that’s not a flop. For people to say The Dukes of Hazzard was a flop–it opened to $30 million! If these movies are flops, why would I still make them?

Jessica Simpson