Sad news for fans of love and romance and happy endings ... though why you'd be looking at Farrah Abraham for any of these things doesn't really make sense.
Farrah and her on-again, off-again boyfriend, Simon Saran, are officially off again.
And it actually seems pretty serious this time.
It all started when Simon had the nerve to post a photo on social media of himself out at a club with some friends, along with a couple of women, heaven forbid.
Farrah flipped out, as Farrah is wont to do, and shared a photo on Snapchat with the caption "When your ex can only get bottle girls LMAO FaceLike."
We assumed that meant that they'd broken up, but Simon has confirmed the sad news in a new interview with Hollywood Life.
"I think Farrah overreacted based on her emotions," he explains. "There's a harmless picture, and that's all it is is a picture."
"But I get it," he adds. "I am a really handsome guy with a great sense of humor and it is something that is very hard to let go of."
Oh, Simon. Oh, honey. No. Stop.
Though he did share this amazingly accurate meme, so we can't hate on him too hard:
"A good man is hard to find cuz he ain't lookin' for you" ... truer words, right?
About the status of his relationship with Farrah right now, he says "I think we are taking a break," which makes it sound like he knows they're going to get back together as soon as she cools down or one of them requires some attention.
The issue, he says, is things are difficult when Teen Mom OG is filming because Farrah turns into that nasty, awful monster we see every season.
And they're filming right now, so the nightmare is real.
As Simon describes it, "During filming season she has a split attitude that I really can't deal with. She turns into a whole different creature that I don't really have the patience for anymore."
And speaking of having a "split attitude" ... it looks like this latest breakup has sent Farrah to a very dark place.
She's deleted both her Instagram and Twitter accounts, though she kept her Snapchat.
It's a good thing, too, because how else would she show Simon what he's missing?
She's in Miami right now, where she ran into Mob Wives star and fellow Marriage Boot Camp attendee, Renee Graziano:
"Single & ready to mingle," get it? Because Simon messed up by being in a place with other women, so she's going to get with other dudes ASAP?
Real mature, Farrah. As always.
She also shared a totally topless photo, because hey, why not?
Feast your eyes on this, Simon:
Bet you're totally regretting being around other girls now, huh? You could have been in Miami with this, but instead you're single and away from Farrah's insanity and ...
On second thought, congrats, Simon.
Now teach the rest of us how to get away from her.