Kate Plus 8 Recap: The Sextuplets Turn Twelve!

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Tuesday on Kate Plus 8, the controversial mom of eight and tabloid mainstay reflected on the milestone of the sextuplets turning 12.

Yes ... the Gosselins are twelve years old!

"The last year before the year of eight teenagers," Kate Gosselin mused, adding "the year I've been dreading since they were all born."

Based on her attitude, we'd think that would apply to every year since they've been born, but ... that's neither here nor there right now.

After all, she has a family to expand.

Yes, expand. Welcome, Nanook and Mack! Kate and the family got a pair of new dogs, then set about planning a big birthday celebration.

For the kids. Not the dogs. Every day is a celebration if you're a dog that has that many kids to play with and is reasonably taken care of.

Of course, there was inevitable, and uncomfortable subject of the proverbial elephant in the room ... or not in the room, or home, as it were:

Collin Gosselin.

Gosselin Family People Cover

With Collin being treated for special needs - or being hidden from Jon Gosselin, to hear him tell it - he will obviously not be at the party.

What kind of issues does the child have?

"I was not able with my own resources here to meet his needs," she explained, pretty much as vaguely as she has in the past.

"He needs to be in an environment to help him learn the skills and help gain the insight to be the best Collin that he can be."

Is Kate lying about his whereabouts? Or being intentionally misleading through omission? We can't say with any certainty.

Whatever his behavior problems may consist of, having a party without Collin was "tough" for the kids and "tough for mom."

Still, however, the show must go on.

Kate Plus Eight

After arguing with their mom briefly, the two older girls, Mady and Cara, performed their decorating duties as instructed by the taskmaster.

Mady said they "slayed" the job no less. Sweet.

When the party finally arrived, Kate gave instructions about the scavenger hunt theme she planned to a bunch of disinterested 'tweens.

Or so it appeared at the time. But it went well.

The hunt mainly consisted of two Gosselin "teams" traveling to local businesses owned by parents of the kids' friends, hunting for goodies.

Because there were more girls than boys in this Battle of the Sexes, Kate gave the boys a head start, which they used to their advantage.

They won. The boys WON!!!

Kate Gosselin on The Celebrity Apprentice

Afterward, it was time to hit the party venue at last, and Kate gave some sage advice to girls about the virtues of sportsmanship.

"Inside, you can think the most horrible things you want, but outside you say, 'Good game,'" she explained, somewhat ironically.

The only person who puts that attitude into practice less effectively than Kate might be her former boss on Celebrity Apprentice.

Just saying. Practice what you preach much? At all?

Anyway, the kids proceeded to play games, take photo booth pics and beat a piñata harder worse than Kate used to whomp Jon.

So to speak. They had a blast is the point.

The money booth, in which the kids grabbed as many floating dollars as they could, was the biggest hit, and an appropriate metaphor.

Kate, after all, is back where she likes to be.

With her trials and tribulations airing on TV, and garnering media attention left and right, she's smack dab in the Money Booth of Life.

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