Is Jennifer Aniston about to have something in common with ex-husband Brad Pitt?
Is she on the verge of a nasty divorce?
Might she and Pitt therefore both soon be single and get back together?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Simply put: no, no and no.
But Star Magazine wants you to believe at least one of those aforementioned rumors.
Despite Aniston having just given an interview in which she gushed over Justin Theroux ("He's such a good person. It hurts me to think of anything hurting him," she told Marie Claire this month), the above cover story claims she and her man are on the outs.
Moreover, Aniston has apparently gained 20 pounds!
This featured Star story screams that “Jen & Justin At Each Other’s Throats!”
The publication further teases an impending breakup between the actress and actor by, of course, referencing Brad Pitt.
“He Rages Over Brad’s Phone Calls To Jen," reads the sub-headline.
According to the affiliated article inside this issue, Aniston and Theroux are "at war" over Pitt, with an anonymous source who is definitely not made-up exclaiming:
“Jealousy rears its ugly head after Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston reconnect behind husband Justin Theroux’s back… and all hell breaks loose.”
All HELL, people. That sounds really bad.
Aniston has been pretty vocal over the past several weeks about her treatment in the media.
"My marital status has been shamed; my divorce status was shamed; my lack of a mate had been shamed; my nipples have been shamed," she told Marie Claire in its most recent cover story.
Previously, Aniston went off on the paparazzi via an op-ed in The Huffington Post.
It was the most angry and impassioned we've ever seen her after years and years of endless pregnancy speculation. And we loved it!
“I’m fed up with the sport-like scrutiny and body-shaming that occurs daily," Aniston wrote at the time, adding:
"If I am some kind of symbol to some people out there, then clearly I am an example of the lens through which we, as a society, view our mothers, daughters, sisters, wives, female friends and colleagues.
"The objectification and scrutiny we put women through is absurd and disturbing."
Is this latest scathing "report" on her marriage a example of female objectification? Not necessarily. It's more directly related to Aniston, with whom the public remains fascinated.
According Star source, Theroux has been “consumed with jealousy” since Aniston allegedly “admitted she’s been speaking with her ex in the wake of his shocking split from Angelina Jolie.”
Adds an insider:
“Jen and Justin have been at each other’s throats ever since he found out about Brad. He feels totally betrayed, but Jen has told him Brad just needs a sympathetic ear and that she accepted his calls because she wanted to be supportive.
"She never expected Justin to react the way he did."
This same (non) source rambles on about how “Brad and Jen have never stopped loving each other” and claims that Theroux’s “anger” over the connection “could threaten their marriage."
Before you get TOO worried about Aniston and Theroux's marriage, just remember: we've been here before.
And before that as well:
Oh, and also before that:
In reality, Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux are as stable as any couple in Hollywood.
That fact just doesn't sell newspapers or magazines. It's sad.