Stassi finally faced Lisa head-on last night on the Vanderpump Rules reunion, James unleashed a tirade at Jax and whoa. Just whoa.
Grab a hat and hold the f–k onto it, people …
On part three of the reunion, or Vanderpump Rules Season 4 Episode 23, the two women came to blows about that sex tape thing.
Specifically, how the Stassi Schroeder sex tape fallout was handled and who did what (or should have or should not have done what).
If you watch Vanderpump Rules online, you know Lisa stepped in, but apparently, she never actually made Stassi’s ex hand over the tape.
Now, Stassi is obviously pissed and fearful that he will release it one day. If nothing else, maybe he’ll threaten to for a Season 5 storyline.
Meanwhile, Katie Maloney explained the return of "Tequila Katie," while Ariana Madix kept hammering away at Kristen Doute’s comedy.
Ariana was being a little harsh, yet spoke for us all when she asked Kristen if she just decided one day to be funny after being so psycho.
She really is a little out there. Witness Kristen and James Kennedy’s one-night stand, in which case she claimed they boned in his car.
James, contrarily, said he bent her over the hood.
So she may or may not be a pathological liar as usual, but either way, she has sex with James Kennedy, which means she truly needs help.
Not to be outdone, James also outed Lala Kent for giving rim jobs, offered to whip out his penis and punch Jax Taylor in his "fat throat."
Good times all around last night on Bravo, no?
"You’re jealous, mate. I said it once I’ll say it again ’till the day I die," James said to Jax, hilariously adding, "I’m not going into detail."
He did say he has a bigger penis, though. FYI.
Willing to pull it out to prove this after getting a “half-chub,” James informed his rival that he is basically a no-talent washed-up hack.
“I’ve got ten times more talent in the bag than this guy could ever dream of,” James said. “I’m trying to do Coachella one day and big things.”
Big things, people. Big. Not half-chub things.