The Bachelorette Recap: The Men Kiss and Tell All

by at . Comments

Following last week's hometown visits and elimination of Zak Waddell, it's time for The Bachelorette season 9 men to tell all before the season's shocking finale!

Do James and Ben have unfinished business? Will Zak get the closure he wants? Will we get any hints as to which gentleman Desiree chose, if she chose one at all?

The Bachelorette spoilers are abuzz with rumors of both heartbreak and engagement and we've got only two weeks to go before we reach the end (or the beginning) of Desiree Hartsock's fairy tale. Let's hear what the men had to say now!

Des Hartsock Image

Chris Harrison introduces the special and only drops 1 "for the right reasons" and none "fairy tales." Plus 3.

Des and Chris crashed some at-home Bachelorette viewing parties. It's...kind of weird. Des drops the words "fairy tale" and isn't at all worried or shocked or scared at how well the women at the girl's nights know her. Not freaked out at all. 

She teams up with J.P. and Ashley to crash some parties in New York. And then the Mesnicks show up. Trista's looking...older. 

There have been 26 seasons of this franchise. Twenty. Six. That's some dedication to ratings love. Plus 8.

Before the men get to tell their stories, Desiree sits down with Emily, Ashley, and Ali to get advice on how to handle the bad boys. Should she play it nice, or let them have it? 

I vote let them have it. The other bachelorettes do, too. Let's do this. Now please.

James and Ben get boos as the guys are introduced. Juan Pablo gets allllllll the cheers. Plus 10.

Chris starts the night by talking to Zak W., who says he had no expectations before signing up and that's what made falling in love so easy. Plus 3.

In order to tease the ladies with that awesome accent, Chris asks Juan Pablo about the camaraderie and drama among the men this season. Can we just hand him a phonebook or a dictionary or something and ask him to start reading?

Desiree Hartsock and Brooks Forester Picture

Michael, who cannot ever seem to shut up, chimes in with something about all the men and only one woman and he's surprised there wasn't more drama. Since it was his life's work to expose some of it, that's just funny. Minus 8

Jonathan, who was eliminated prior to the first rose ceremony for continually asking Desiree to go to the Fantasy Suite with him, looks on the verge of vomiting while watching the playback of his limited time on the show. And then he apologizes to all of America for having to watch that. 

After being busted as a cheater, Brian opted not to come to the men tell-all. So the guys are opting to talk about him. Plus 9.

Kasey seems like he's going to cry every time he speaks. Minus 3.

Juan Pablo speaking! I'm not even sure exactly what he says because I'm temporarily deafened by his hotness and who really cares anyway!! If only I could hear with my eyes! Plus 10

The first man in the hot seat? Ben. 

He's wearing quite the grin during the playback of his montage and blames his reaction in the limo on the fact that he'd been battered for 8 hours.

He says he's different around girls than he is around guys and Mikey T. calls him out on that. Juan Pablo says he knew Ben would be trouble from the minute Ben said "I'm not here to make friends." 

Ben Scott Photo

Ben doesn't think he was ever a different guy on camera than he was off. Every guy calls that a lie. And then a guy I don't even remember says he had a conversation with Ben's Baby Mama in Vegas where she said he only wanted custody of Brody after he was done with the show. And then there's more stuff. Like the fact that he got his baby mama pregnant while he was dating someone else. Yikes! Minus 20.

More cheers for Juan Pablo! Plus 8.

Ben says none of the guys know anything about him as a father and asserts that he's a very good father. 

Next up in the hot seat next to Chris Harrison? James.

He puts the blame for any and all comments about him becoming the next bachelor on Mikey. And then says that Mikey said stuff about introducing him to other girls. It was all Mikey. Minus 10.

He doesn't understand why the guys waited 6 days to confront him about what they overheard and thinks some of the guys there owe him an apology. But not Kasey. Or Drew. He doesn't care what they have to say. Minus 12.

Mikey finally gets a chance to speak and says that their conversation came about because Brooks kept getting roses and he was so different from the two of them. What did he have that they didn't? 

James Case and Desiree Hartsock

He conveniently doesn't remember who said what about becoming the next bachelor. Minus 14. Mikey maintains that in life people have to have back-up plans. That doesn't sit well with Kasey at all.

Kasey doesn't feel the same about Mikey as he feels about James because Mikey never professed his love for Desiree and James did. Kasey's really, really still worked up about this and it makes me forget all about his early-season hashtagging of everything.

Yay, more Juan Pablo speaking! Juan Pablo likes James but wouldn't want his daughter or his sister to date James. Plus 10.

No one in the audience wants James to be the next bachelor. 

But who DO we want to be the next bachelor? Juan Pablo. He didn't get much screen time but he definitely stole the hearts and minds of everyone who watched. 

The audience is crying watching him cry while talking about his daughter. Plus 20.

Chris asks him to talk about himself and his first answer is about his daughter. He doesn't date much because he's with his daughter on the weekends and that's when people are free to date. 

He wants to settle down and have two more kids. Plus 15. There's an audience full of women who volunteer as tribute. 

Desiree and Zak

And now it's Zak's turn to talk about his journey. I think he's been hanging out with Ryan Seacrest's spray-tanner since his departure. Minus 3.

I really do like him, though. Can he be the next bachelor?

He doesn't know when things changed in his relationship with Des but suspects it was because he often comes off as too bold. He doesn't meet a lot of women where he lives and with his job, so he's really bummed this didn't work out. So are we, Zak! Minus 9.

In addition to being bold, he's also incredibly romantic. In the back of the journal he gave Desiree, he wrote a poem in disappearing ink and he doesn't even know if she read it. It's way better than anything Chris wrote. Way. Plus 20.

He's still in love with Desiree and this will be his first time seeing her since she loaded him into a limo. 

Desiree's in the hot seat now and she says sending people home was tough.

Jonathan apologizes for being a douche on night one and manages to drop a "for the right reasons" into it. Minus 9 for that phrase. Next she gets to confront Ben. 

He says he's aggressive in going after a girl and he was no different in going after Des. She changes her tune a bit and says that early on she questioned his sincerity because she couldn't see emotion in his eyes. That's not exactly how she played it prior to kicking him to the curb. Minus 17

James is up next and Des says that he manipulated her on the steps before she sent him home. He doesn't believe he did manipulate her but apologizes to her anyway and wishes her the best.

James Case Photo

Desiree got hate mail for sending Juan Pablo home. Which makes sense because hello, he's hot. The hottest one there.

Zak's goodbye was the toughest and Desiree said she was afraid that he wouldn't lean on her during the less happy times of their relationship together because he was always so positive. She wondered if he was using his smile as a mask.

He couldn't think of what to say when he was eliminated, so he wrote her a song. The audience is crying. But the song is kind of odd. 

She wishes him peace and happiness. He nods. Plus 10.

And now it's time for bloopers. These should be aired during the actual show because they're funny and they make the guys seem human. 

There's a shocking 2-part finale this season that Chris says has an ending we won't see coming! It's the "most emotionally intense" finale ever. We'll find out next week when the first part airs.


The Bachelorette Review

Editor Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
  • 5.0 / 5.0
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Tags: , ,