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“You’re a pro’s pro.” – Dan Patrick to Charlie Sheen

When Charlie Sheen, whose producer thinks could die at any time, thinks you need to get it together? Not a good sign. But that’s Lindsay Lohan for you.

The Two and a Half Men star called in to The Dan Patrick Show to offer her advice this morning. Really, he did. Two words, girlfriend: Impulse control.

Denying that he’s ever been drunk or high on set, Sheen calls himself a seasoned vet who finds a way to pull it together no matter how hung over he is.

You heard the man, Lindsay. Learn from the best: