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Following his latest evening of porn star banging, cocaine smoking and hospital visiting, Charlie Sheen checked himself into rehab yesterday.

Problem on the verge of being solved, right. More like: Yeah, right.

Very soon after the actor entered an undisclosed treatment center, he sent a text message to Radar Online editor-in-chief Dylan Howard. It didn’t exactly read like a man who has moved past the denial stage.

Charlie Sheen wrote one porn star a $30,000 check this week. It’s a small price to pay for crack-smoking company.

“People don’t seem to get it,” Sheen wrote. “Guy can’t have a great time and do his job also?”

As for critics, which include his concerned boss at CBS and 95% of the population, listen up: You’re just a “bunch of turds,” Charlie added.

The Two and a Half Men star might take issue with the following question even being asked (get clean from what?!?), but you tell us: Can Charlie Sheen get clean?