Donald Trump: Carrie Prejean to Remain Miss California

by at .  Updated at .

That may have been the worst 30 minutes of our lives.

We just sat through a press conference hosted by Donald Trump, the owner of the Miss USA pageant, as he spoke glowingly about Carrie Prejean and gave her the opportunity to stand on a soap box and peer down at the ignorant, hateful Americans that dared to question her right of free speech.

Before we detail the event in full, here's a nauseating rundown of the main points:

  • Prejean will remain Miss California USA;
  • Trump would love to have Perez Hilton as a judge again next year;
  • Carrie's grandfather fought at The Battle of the Bulge in World War II and (cue tears!) Carrie said what happened to her should NOT happen in America. It undermines the Constitutional rights her grandfather fought for.
  • Regarding the topless photos that were leaked this morning, Prejean said (READY FOR THIS????) that they were the result of a "windy day" and that she had no idea the photographer would ever release them.
  • Seriously, folks: Carrie Prejean claims the wind, and an immoral photographer, are to blame for this picture!

It bears repeating, over and over and over: Carrie Prejean says she is only showing a nipple in this photograph because it was a "windy day."

The press conference began with Trump, clearly loving the attention, summarizing the recent series of events involving Miss California. He said she gave an "honorable" answer to a controversial, fair question and that Carrie's response echoed that of the President of the United States.

He also said if Prejean's beauty wasn't so great, nobody really would have cared what she said. (Got that message, ladies? Ugly women needn't ever bother giving their opinions!)

Trump said he reviewed the semi-naked photos carefully and emphasized that this is the "21st century." He determined the photos were "fine... beautiful... risque.. and, in many cases, actually lovely."

Regarding Miss California officials Keith Lewis and Shanna Moakler, Trump said they met for hours with Prejean in his office. The miscommunication issues they had with her are "totally solved" and Carrie will make them proud.

It was then time for Prejean to read a statement from the podium.

In a statement we've paraphrased, Carrie said:

"Thank you, Mr. Trump, for believing in me and allowing me to continue as Miss California USA. Thank you to the Miss California USA organization for believing in me and for believing in women. Thank you to the thousands of Americans who sent letters, emails and messages. I cannot count the amount of fan mail I've received in last three weeks.

At the Miss USA pageant, I was asked a question by a judge with a personal agenda. I answered sincerely from my heart. I did not want to offend anyone. I was given a question asking for my opinion and I stated my honest belief.

Through no fault of my own, this led to a cultural firestorm in the media. I need to now address the hateful attacks, despicable rumors and false allegations that have come my way in the days since. They have taught me to stand up for what you believe in. I am a strong woman. I am now able to move forward and be the best Miss California USA that I can be.

I am not an activist, nor do I have a personal agenda. I've been thrown into this firestorm. I've become an advocate for the importance of not redefining marriage, based on my own personal beliefs. I'm proud to be an American. I'm proud of the freedoms we enjoy."

(Carrie then turned on the waterworks in reference to her aforementioned grandfather, clearly oblivious to the irony of shedding tears over freedom, while standing AGAINST the rights of gays to marry.)

Click on the pics above to enlarge the latest round of Carrie Prejean pictures.

Regarding the first set of quasi-naked pictures released, Prejean said they were taken by a girlfriend at home to include in her modeling portfolio. They were intended "for application, not publication."

When asked by a reporter why she didn't mention these on her Miss California application, as her contract required, Prejean replied: "Do you remember everything you did when you were 16?"

(Yes, Carrie, if we were 16 just five years ago and had topless photos taken, it would likely remain in our memory.)

Prejean concluded her statement by sending a message to Americans everywhere: "Do not be silent. Take the story of mine and apply it to your own life. Think of how much better our society would be if we could agree to disagree and show respect."

It's true, people. Why couldn't African Americans in the 1960s simply agree to disagree with the views of whites that believed they should only sit in the back of the bus?

Seriously, couldn't they have simply respectfully disagreed and gone to those separate but equal schools?!? Why drag courts into a simple matter of opinion?

Didn't Carrie Prejean's grandfather, and veterans across the country, fight for the freedom of bigots to oppress the rights of those that gross them out?

Do you think Trump made the right decision in keeping the crown on Prejean's head?

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