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While shopping on Sunday, a naked Britney Spears surprised employees at a Betsey Johnson store inside the Westfield Fashion Square in Sherman Oaks by, well, being naked.

According to Life & Style Weekly, Britney grabbed dresses from the racks and disappeared into a dressing room with enabling boyfriend Adnan Ghalib. Moments later, the embarrassment of a mother came out in her birthday suit, to the shock of salesclerks.

“I was blown away. Britney’s private parts were right in front of me!” a store employee told Life & Style. “I grabbed a dress to cover her and she screamed, ‘Get away from me! Don’t you f—— come near me!'”

The employee then made it sound as though Spears and Ghalib had a private, nude party in the dressing room because “they were making weird noises,” until the attention-starved couple stumbled out together and Britney did her best Victoria Beckham impression.

“I couldn’t understand a word she was saying,” the employee said. “She was slurring and spitting, and talking with a British accent. Her face was covered with cold sores and acne, and her scalp was patchy. I wanted to help her, but she was so mean that I left her alone.”

From there, allegedly, Spears screamed, “F— you!” and exited the store.

See, these are the kinds of things you can’t do with kids by your side. Is there any wonder now why Britney ignored her custody hearing?