With all due respect to Howard K. Stern (i.e. absolutely none whatsoever), there are better examples of celebrity parenting skills than this shady lawyer has recently depicted.
Take Jennifer Garner, for example.
The actress has proven, time and again, that her most appropriate alias is "great mother." Seen here, J-Garn is playing around with adorable baby, Violet. Mother and daughter have even made a new little friend.
Give her to Garner. Even with Ben Affleck as a father, the girl will stand a great chance of growing up happily.