Numerous sources confirm that the wondrous Britney Spears is set to renew her wedding vows with disgrace white trash loser worthless human being husband Kevin Federline, the former backup dancer and current aspiring rapper she dubiously married in 2004.
The singer and husband will hold a ceremony this fall, shortly after the birth of their second child, rumored to be entering this cruel world on Halloween. Britney was expected to give birth next month, but Federline let it slip during a recent radio interview that his wife is planning to go into labor on Halloween day.
Appearing on DJ Ryan Seacrest’s KIIS FM show, Federline told the American Idol host that his second child with Spears was due “soon,” later blurting out “October 31.”
When pressed about his future family plans, the fertile Federline told Seacrest that he’s totally “gonna slow down for a little while, I promise,” yo.
Just as when Spears birthed son Sean Preston last September 14, his cute little sibling will be arriving via caesarian section.
This is convenient, as it makes it easy for mom to plan when she wishes to crank out her offspring, and for K-Fed to blab about it on the radio. In his defense, though, he may have confused the date with that of his many other kids’ birthdays.
As for their renewed vows, the couple will invite hundreds of friends and family, as Britney hopes to show the world she is happily married. Good luck with that! In honor of this occasion, we’ve posed a close-up shot of Britney before she became a perpetually knocked-up, dark-haired train wreck.
We’re not saying she’s ugly nowadays, like some assclowns have… but let’s just say sometimes we long for the days of yore.