Jersey Shore Recap: Paula Pickard, Peace Out

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This week on Jersey Shore, Paula Pickard may have dodged a bullet.

To find out exactly why, read on for THG's full recap of that Situation!

Mike The Situation Pic

"I definitely wanna break up with Paula in a smooth and easy way because I'd like to still hit it. 'Listen girl, it's not me. It's you. Can I still hit it?'" - Mike. Minus 180.

The Situation also let us know that he wants a girl like his sister or his mother (his words). Apparently that is not Paula Pickard, hot as she may be. Minus 80.

Mike also has girl problems ... with Snooki. Much as he wants to apologize and get back to normal, she seems interested in nothing of the sort.

Snooki tells Sammi, Ronnie and JWoww that Mike won't be invited to her wedding, and even if he apologizes, she doesn't want him in her life. Burn. Plus 50.

We'd feel bad except it's Mike. How many times did he flat out f--k with Snook for no reason at all, then act like he's beyond reproach? Douche. Minus 30.

Jenni planned a pre-baby shower for her girl Snook. Aww. Plus 30.

Vinny felt a little awkward given the whole Jionni thing. Minus 20.

"Oh, I just wish she was having a girl," says Deena. Cute, but if you've seen any Snooki baby photos, you know Lorenzo's as sweet as can be. Plus 100.

Mike and Paula

Back to the Mike and Paula mess. Wouldn't you know it, Mike kept blabbing about wanting to dump her and eventually it got back to her. Plus 20.

Imagine if he wore the "Let's Make It Unofficial" shirt Vinny made. Plus 10.

As Pauly D puts it, "This movie just got interesting." Plus 10.

She called and told him she overheard her co-workers mentioning how he wanted to split, and of course he denies it. Wait, Paula has a job? Plus 20.

Then the breakdown. Paula cried. Mike used words like "sweetie" and "babe" trying to make her feel better, but not really meaning them. Minus 40.

Just like that ... boom. It's over. Yet the "breakup" ended with kisses and hugs. What the? Smooth move, Sitch. Don't know how you do it, dog. Plus 30.

"I've never seen people make out when they break up," says Vinny. Mike didn't even need his backup "squad of guido goons" ... good thing. Plus 10.

SIDE NOTE: Props again for the cast's "Restore the Shore" telethon. Nice to see they're not entirely clueless and want to give back to the area. Plus 30.

EPISODE TOTAL: -40! SEASON TOTAL: +225!

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Paula is a JWOWW tomboy,she needs to prove that she got the guts to become a Sweetheart girl

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@ Martel Owens

Mike The Situation is lookin 4 a Girl whos from New Jersey,who is a Sweetheart,whos DTF and Straight Edge

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I love this recap, “Wait, Paula has a job?” It amazes me how Mike still tries to play these games even though he is thirty years old. I wasn’t able to watch this episode when it aired because I had to go into work at DISH. I wasn’t sure I would make it back before the re-runs aired so I set my DISH Hopper to record it. There is over 2,000 hours of DVR room so I can record the entire season without taking up much space. I hope some day Snooki will own up to the fact that she was with Mike; if Jionni can forgive her, she should be able to forgive herself.

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