Jersey Shore Recap: The Paula Pickard Situation

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This week on Jersey Shore, Deena's parents paid a visit and Mike squirmed in the clutches of increasingly attached girlfriend Paula Pickard. How did that go down?

Read on for THG's full recap!

Mike and Paula

Deena Cortese did not leave the Jersey Shore house, despite many threats and some dramatic editing to make you second guess her intentions. Phew.

After a visit from her parents, getting scolded about her recent Meatball Day arrest and staying in for the night, she appeared to chill out for once. Plus 10.

"Pace yourself, like a normal person does in Jersey," says Pauly. As if. Minus 5.

Pauly and Vinna bring girls home from Karma. Plus only 5 because that's getting a little tired at this point. Time to grow up and settle down, you guys.

With each other. Come on, you know you want to. Plus 15.

Knock us over with a feather. The Situation was grinding and flirting like a madman at the club, but did NOT take any potential one-night skanks home.

Still, when the ladies of the house tried to explain why his actions weren't cool, he almost dropped the L-bomb when talking about GF Paula Pickard!

Almost. But it's Sitch people. Baby steps. Plus 10.

Meatball Day

Sammi attributed Deena's idiocy to only-child syndrome. Would also explain Snooki, but there's more than that, Sam. It's called "Alcohol." Minus 10.

On double date with Deena, Mike is clearly uncomfortable with his girl. Dude actually says he likes it better when Paula just sits there and smiles.

Hard to get more insulting than that, Mike. Minus 45.

The girl wears butt pads unabashedly and has no qualms about anything she says or does. Plus 25, because if that's not Wife-Her-Up material, what is?

Sammi says if she was Paula, she would turn around and hit Mike with her bag. Yup, that's probably kind of totally accurate, based on experience. Plus 10.

Mike tried to live vicariously through Pauly and Vinny at Aztec. Kind of douchey. Fortunately, the old lady getting freaky on the dance floor stole the show. Plus 20.

"It's an adjustment period," the Situation says repeats to himself and others, about being in a relationship. "As a man, I'm trying." SO hard, too. Minus 30.

SIDE NOTE: The cast will host a telethon to "Restore the Shore" this month. They've made appeals online and on TV about Hurricane Sandy's destruction. Plus 30.

EPISODE TOTAL: +35! SEASON TOTAL: +265!

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Paula did make a much better first impression, acting lady like and loyal to Mike. So at first, I was feeling sorry for Paula, Mike did her dirty, prowling for other girls, only to call her if he strikes out! However, what she did, the way she acted, was so low, I kinda don't blame Mike for wanting to get away from her. Come on...who would share that info (butt pads), in front of Tue whole house, TMI!! I'm sure, not only was he embarrassed, but her actions probably turned him off. Then it dawned on me....she trying to act out for the camera! I see it now! Mike must've felt so hurt, used! Her whole scam was to get on the show...doesn't she claim to be a model?? Think about it.. Either way, they both screwed up and do not belong together. Both ate using each other! Maybe they deserve eachother?

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I feel sorry for Paula, but I think she knows Mike does not want anything serious, but she chooses to ignore it; her reasons are not very clear other than to get some air time.
I was only able to watch part of this episode because I had to go back to work at DISH. I wasn’t sure if I would make it back home in time for the reruns so I set my DISH Hopper to record this episode, and since I have so much DVR recording room I’m recording the rest of the season, this way I won’t miss any of the drama. I can’t wait to see the old lady stealing the show at Aztec.

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