Gary Shirley always lives large, but usually just in the literal sense. We are saying he is morbidly obese, in case you did not catch the inference.
Earlier this summer, however? Wow.
The baby daddy of Amber Portwood went on an epic strip club bender, dropping FIVE GRAND on 11 hours of mediocre half-nude action.
Talk about a good use of five Gs.
The Teen Mom fixture absolutely made it rain at a 24-hour strip club in Miami, Fla., unleashing a constant stream of cash from 1 a.m. UNTIL NOON.
According to sources inside the club, Gary Shirley kicked off the evening in the VIP area, then moved the action over to the champagne room.
Amber and Leah would be so happy to hear it.
Check out TMZ's full gallery of the affair, if you care, but don't expect to see any of the human race's more attractive members. Just saying.