The Real Housewives of New York City Recap: Your Tweeting Heart

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I hate to sound like Kelly, but Simon is so weird. He's always creeped me out and this installment of The Real Housewives of New York City was no exception. So let's recap everyone's quirks in our patented +/- review, shall we?

Cindy throws a party to launch her new wax and body bejeweling kits. Everyone gets into the act, but PLUS 10 for Brad going all out with a bejeweled tramp stamp. No, we haven't gotten to the weird part yet.

Simon in Trouble

That takes place when Simon finds Jill. First, he sits down so close he's practically feeling her up. MINUS 5 for already making me uncomfortable. Then he starts the conversation by saying, "You and Alex have burned."

Excuse me? As Jill is just as confused as the rest of us, he explains that he's referring to Jill and Alex sharing the fire pit. Finally, he goes into his request for lunch because "we need to talk."

PLUS 5 to Kelly for calling it. Simon is such a girl. What guy comes up to a woman and says we need to have lunch to talk?!? When Jill turns his invitation down, he cryptically tells her to "watch out." For what exactly? He doesn't say. This guy is just strange. 

The fun part comes when everyone gets into the mix because none of these people can ever mind their own business. Luann tells Jill not to give Simon the time of day. After her blow up with Alex over lunch, this shouldn't be a surprise.

Kelly then hunts down Alex to have their own lunch to discuss the matter. MINUS 7 for not being able to leave it alone and for making so little sense during the conversation.

Lunches are tough on this show. I don't know how anyone can eat with all of that tension. This meal is almost as bad as last week's between Alex and Luann. I think Alex needs to lighten up on the eyeliner. MINUS 8 because she's reminding me of Skeletor.

The rumor is that Simon is cyber-bullying Jill and perhaps the other Housewives. Watch out for those mean Tweets, ladies.

Happy Housewives

I'm not always a huge fan of Mario's, but I have to throw him a PLUS 3 for calling out Simon on the strange outfit. It's "another muumuu or whatever the hell he's wearing." I think it was leather, too.

OK, enough about Simon. Our other Housewives had issues as well. Luann painted at Jill's. Really, she painted in high end boots and lace hosiery.  Still, I'm actually impressed. Luann picked up a paint brush. PLUS 3.

Even stranger, Sonja has a Blackberry in her toilet and doesn't know it.  PLUS 5 for the plumber making her dig it out.  At least he didn't charge her.

Cindy's daughter is so darn cute but MINUS 3 for not having any idea how to handle your own child. She literally calls in reinforcements to get through a meal.

Ramona earns a PLUS 10 for throwing a lovely party for her and her friend. Sonja really did tear up and the slides were a sweet moment and a nice insight into their relationship. Is Ramona growing up? She handled that conflict with Jill like a calm, rational adult.  Another PLUS 10.  Go Ramona.

Hang on for next week when Luann shoots a music video.  No, I'm not kidding.

EPISODE TOTAL: +23! SEASON TOTAL: 40!

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mommielonglegs - THANKS for putting in your two cents. You are right on money, Honey !!!

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I know Bethanny is looking at HNY saying "Thank God", she should also thank the first Jason for not wanting her, because her husband, who is handsome,sexy,funny and smart, her beautiful baby and lovely inlaws are all true blessings.

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I think Kelly is totally weird. She should just keep her mouth shut. She makes no sense at all. Luann needs to get a life and stop trying to protect Jill. Maybe if Luann had been as involved with her marriage to the count, he wouldn't have cheated on her. Jill needs to stop being mean. She made her bed now she needs to sleep in it.

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Kelly should just stick to her children. I like Jill, it seems everyone is blasting her for something. Luann, i haven't got the words, dahling. Another one to just stick to her own family and leave everyone alone. Simon is strange, but come on. we all knew what he was. Alex is caught in between and likes to be the mother to her husband

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Jill is gross, jealous and just evil. LuAnn will soon drown with that nose in the air the next time its rains. Can't sing and always telling people what to do and how to act. Get over yourself! Kelly is stupid, plain and simple.

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LuAnn is just her! She doesn't act like any one else and I can't respect that. And Jill is Jill. I like her and think she more like our neighbor and ourselves that's why folks reacted so strong toward her. But be honest, she can only say I'm sorry so much. She's paid her dues and IMO it's time to find another target cause it's getting old. Not everyone likes the same person and that makes life fun. So to me I LOVE JILL! It's okay if the next reply doesn't. But I think being herself is what she should do. She will not make a good someone else. Have a great week end all! Live all day and be happy

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What happened this season.? everyone is so accepting of Kelly and her weirdness. She seems to be putting everyone down for being Creepy but did she forget she was the Queen of Creepy and Weird.

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Kelly is still as crazy as ever!!!!!!!!!!

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Sometimes I think Kelly and LuAnn don't realize that their both divorced!

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I think Kelly Bensimon is clueless and is a follower! I think she should stick to what she's best at and that's horseback riding! And go find a new man! I think Simon is fun! And Alex should walk away from this group before they really say something that would hurt Simon! I don't think Simon was being weird at all he just wants not bad feelings between Alex and Jill! Kelly stay out of things u don't belong mixing with!