The Hills Recap: "A Date With the Past"

If The Hills were a soap opera (which it sort of is), this would be the week that the original cast member returned to fireworks and high drama.

Our subject is none other than Stephen Colletti, Lauren Conrad's best friend, then love interest, then... who knows! Anyway, he's alive - and HOT!

He's a guest at the housewarming party LC, Lo and Audrina throw for their new digs. Their digs are pretty nice. They cost like $2 million. But that never even comes up. Audrina lives in the GUEST HOUSE! Quite the pad, LC.

Everyone rolls to the housewarming party - everyone other than Stephanie Pratt, who makes a point of letting Heidi Montag know beforehand how she's going. Heidi then guilt-trips Steph out of it. Lame.

When Audrina mentions that her on-again beau Justin-Bobby plans to attend, the room goes silent. "Maybe he will wear his cowboy hat," Lo jokes.

Audrina Patridge? Not pleased.

Justin-Bobby (a.k.a. Justin Brescia) does indeed show at LC's. He's looking less scruffy than usual in his new 'do, but he's still Justin-Bobby. He and Audrina talk about how ostracized she feels from LC and Lo.

Brody Jenner brings girlfriend Cora Skinner, but her awkward introduction to LC comes and goes without incident. She's, like, focused on Stephen!

Lauren "Lo" Bosworth is delighted when Stephen Colletti arrives: "You guys are hanging out again? That melts my little black heart!" Lo says.

"LOVE ME" EYES: Lauren Conrad stares at Stephen Colletti on The Hills. With that face, one wonders how he could resist jumping her right there at the restaurant!

But, despite Lo's dreams, LC and Stephen aren't dating - nor will they be in the future. One night later, Lauren got dolled up for a date with Stephen, who made it clear he thinks of them as just friends.

When LC mentions how giddy Lo acted about their date, Stephen Colletti says: "She's like everyone else wishing someone would happen between you and I."

Lauren Conrad looked very disappointed, yet seemed at the same time to realize that Stephen was probably right - their dating days had passed.

LC turns home and eats ice cream, telling Lo (looking adorable in her UCLA sweatshirt) that "Some things are just better left the way they are."

What happens next? We'll have to wait until next Monday to find out. In the meantime, be sure to check out our new collection of The Hills quotes!