If Suri Cruise Could Talk... She'd Want Out!

by at . Comments

If babies (or Jessica Simpson) were smart enough to put together complete sentences, oh, the sweet, innocent and inane things they would say.

Alas, all we can do is speculate. Below, T.H. Gossip has done just that, taking a trip inside the mind of that little Asian cutie, Suri Cruise.

Suri Scores Toys

Despite the adulation of her parents, Suri clearly realizes -- even at the tender age of six months -- that TomKat has more than a few screws loose. To say the least. They practice Scientology, which is essentially witchcraft. Suri's pleas for help do not fall upon deaf ears, we assure you... but Tom Cruise's rather large security detail might have something to say about our liberating the poor tyke. *sigh*

Well, a Gossip website can dream, at least. FREE SURI!

Tags:

Suri Cruise Biography

Suri Cruise: NOT Baby Gap Model
Yes, Suri Cruise exists. And sort of looks Asian! It wasn't a guarantee that the daughter of Tom Cruise was even real for awhile. Before... More »
Born
Birthplace
Los Angeles, California
Full Name
Suri Cruise