E.L. James' Grey has officially been released, and the alternate edition of 50 Shades of Grey - told from Christian's perspective - is epic.
Epic in the unintentional comedy sense of the word, that is.
Behold, some of the best (or should we say worst) quotes, reviews and reactions from the Christian-centric version of the erotic novel.
Suffice it to say, Twitter is having a field day right now.
That'll Teach Her
"An image of her shackled to my bench, peeled gingeroot inserted in her ass so she can't clench her buttocks, comes to mind, followed by judicious use of a belt or strap. Teah … that would teach her not to be so irresponsible. The thought is hugely appealing."
In a Daze
"She's staring at me wide-eyed and dazed, and it makes me uncomfortable. Can she read my mind? Or is she just looking at a pretty face?"
Get ready for 'em.
Put the P Into Her V
Christian has a way with words.
Her Pelvis Flexes
Our stomach churns.
We're sorry too.