On Season 4, Episode 10 of 90 Day Fiance: The Other Way, there were no more secrets.
(At least, none that we, the audience, know about)
Instead, there were big questions. Of finances, love, acceptance, and how to move forward.
And, in one case, a question of will you marry me.
Check out our full recap:
Gabriel Paboga and Isabel Posada
Isabel’s dad hangs out with Gabe while the two exercise. They speak casually in Spanish before they delve into the big stuff. This is their first one-on-one conversation since Gabriel came out as trans to Isabel’s parents.
So Gabe opens up about his story
He describes, in detail, what it is like to grow up with dysphoria. Long before he knew the words to describe how he felt, long before he knew that there were other men just like him, he knew that he didn’t feel right as or fit in as a “little girl.” In fact, Gabe also experienced dysphoria over his body. Not all trans folks have the exact same experience, but his story is a familiar one.
Gabe even walks his future father-in-law through his journey
Sharing his childhood photos is not easy, but he wants to be an open book to the man whom he hopes will soon be family. This is emotional for Gabe, because these photos remind him of how deeply miserable he used to be in his own body and in terms of how others perceived him. And it’s emotional for Isabel’s dad, too. He is learning about Gabriel’s personal pain.
It is an educational moment for him
Everyone has their “first trans friend.” Some haven’t had one yet. Others might end up being their own “friend” in that regard. Isabel’s dad had never imagined a story like Gabriel’s. And he sees the contrast in Gabe — not only that he has a beard now, but how happy and full of life he is.
Isabel’s dad’s compassion is informed by his faith
Gabe has had a lot of bad experiences with people weaponizing their Christian views to hurl bigotry at him. It is one of the most common forms of transphobia. But in Isabel’s dad, he sees something else — a guy citing his Christian beliefs for why he is so accepting of the man whom his daughter loves.
And Gabe also has a question: how would he feel about Gabe asking Isabel to marry him?
Though the question initially renders Isabel’s dad speechless, he says that it would be great. Specifically, he notes that he has been hoping to see Isabel settle down and be happy. Now, he notes. Gabe just needs to ask Isabel.
So, later, Gabe and Isabel do some pottery
They’re having a good time, and Isabel gets to see the finished, glazed work from her kids. Sara did a floral plate, while her son Miguel did a very handsome Snorlax and an accompanying pokeball.
But what about Gabe’s project?
Isabel has just enough time to wonder why his plate seems to be a little different from the others before he drops to one knee beside her and begins reading her a speech, in Spanish.
We didn’t need the translation to know what he was asking
He wanted to know if Isabel, who became visibly overjoyed during this scene, would marry him.
YES
He slips the ring onto her finger. They are officially engaged, with the blessing of her kids and her dad. We feel overjoyed for this fan-favorite couple.
Daniele Gates and Yohan Geronimo
Remember the conversation from last episode? They’re still having it. Daniele’s friend, whom she once dated, is about to be in town. She’s not asking to sneak off and boink him for old times’ sake, but to hang out with him — and she has invited Yohan along. He does not like this idea, though he does at least acknowledge that there is clearly a cultural difference involved. For many (not all, but many) Americans, being friends with your ex is extremely normal.
Yohan does that thing where he speaks calmly but without an ounce of chill
The idea that Daniele would even want to meet up with her friend — with him in tow, even — feels like an insult in ways that is probably hard for many of us to understand. He tells Daniele that she can meet up with the guy if she wants, but there will be “consequences.” Also, he’s not going.
Yohan is now in a bad mood and is ready to go
At first, he insists upon driving. He has had, it seems, a bit more to drink than Daniele has. So that’s not going to happen.
Eventually, he does hand over the keys
Daniele drives them home. En route, Yohan reminds her that there will be vague “consequences” if she insists upon meeting up with her friend. It’s all very weird.
Debbie Aguero and Oussama
After getting off to a rocky start after Debbie first arrived, things are back on track for this pair. At least, that is Debbie’s assessment.
Oussama has planned a date for the two of them
They go to a public poetry reading. Debbie wonders if the cafe caters to “young people” because the people there are young creatives (in their twenties and thirties, mostly), noting that her town in Georgia does not have a venue like this. She and Oussama both love poetry, but they’re not just there to listen.
Oussama stands up to read a poem
To Debbie’s delight, he dedicates it to her — calling her his fiancee to a room full of strangers. She previously had some doubts about how he feels about her, but this seems to wash them away.
And then there is the poem itself
Oussama is a painter and a poet, and this … certainly is a poem. It is all about Debbie and his love for her. The appreciation of a poem is largely subjective. Not entirely, but largely. What matters is that Debbie absolutely loves it, equating this experience to drinking a glass of cognac.
Oussama says that this is just the beginning
He wants to prove his love and commitment to Debbie with actions, rather than just by saying the right things to her. But … how long will this last?
Jen Boecher and Rishi Singh
Just weeks ahead of their reunion, Rishi and Jen are looking forward to seeing each other again. Rishi sits down with his friend, Nitesh, who is also an astrologer. It is remarkably hot, even for India.
Jen will soon be there, Rishi shares
We hope that she double-checked her new visa situation with an immigration attorney. Not everyone clearly understands legal writing, so it’s good to consult an expert when you need to.
Nitesh does not have good news for him
According to space-based divination, Jen and Rishi are not going to have an easy time making their relationship work. And while Rishi has already delayed telling his family about the relationship by a couple of years, he’s supposed to delay a while longer.
When should Rishi tell his family about Jen?
August 2, at around 4pm in the late afternoon. How will Jen react to that? Honestly, we expect remarkable patience. She has already shown him a lot.
Jen arrives!
In the car, she is bristling with excitement to see him. However, she admits that she also feels disgusted when she thinks about him sending that shirtless thirst trap to her friend while seemingly trying to make plans to meet.
All of that goes out the window when she sees him again
To her embarrassment, Jen’s fondness for Rishi and her attraction to him overpowers her hurt feelings and concerns. When she sees him there, looking handsome and holding a bouquet of roses, she’s just happy to see him.
And Rishi has gone all out on the apartment
This time, it looks like things are more to her liking. Remember last time, when she was freezing in her own bed? Now there’s a heat wave, but there’s an air conditioner. Other things are now to her liking. And there is even a welcome mat. Well done, Rishi!
Later, they do some sort of oil therapy
The intention is to help Jen relax (while Rishi shows off his handsome body), but Jen does ask him a very pointed question — he must have women sliding into his DMs all of the time, right? How does he respond to those?
Rishi says that he never plans to meet up
Sure, he’ll reply. But he doesn’t make commitments to meet with anyone … he claims.
But actually, no, that’s not the truth, Rishi
Jen unfortunately has some receipts. She shows Rishi screenshots that her friend took while she catfished Rishi. He took the bait, sending a thirst trap of himself wearing only a towel. He also asked about meeting up. Now, Jen is in fairly good humor about this, but she does admit that seeing these pics makes all of the things that he has sent her feel less special. That makes sense.
Kris Foster and Jeymi Noguera
Now happily married, Kris and Jeymi are trying to figure out their lives together. They suffered a setback — Kris’ bank noticed that “someone” was spending her money in Colombia, assumed a case of identity theft, and froze her account. Kris is going to have to sort this out. But it is a reminder that the two of them could make their own income.
They want to run a food truck
Right now, it’s a very early idea. They’re not sure of the menu, exactly, except that it will combine American and Venezuelan food.
One food truck is actually surprisingly affordable
One costs $10,000 … but it’s a pretty basic mobile kitchen, and the actual truck is only part of their future overhead.
What about something larger?
There is a school bus that someone has converted into a food truck. This one has interior seating, making it a portable restaurant. It also has horror movie decor, with zombie survival vibes. Kris really digs the vibes of it, though she and Jeymi would likely go in a different direction for their own restaurant.
Could be a bit pricier
Even though it’s the total package, the bus would be about $20,000. Jeymi and Kris will need to have a lot of conversations about overhead costs and more to make sure that they can make this work. It is so, so easy for a restaurant to cost more than it makes.
Later, Kris has to head to Alabama
Kris has to sort things out with her bank. Simply put, she has to prove that she is not only living in Colombia, but not some sort of hostage. While she’s there, she will get a refill of her narcolepsy meds. They don’t have them in Colombia.
It’s a tearful goodbye
Jeymi has been sick for days before this. And the two have only known each other in person for about a month. But they’re married. Kris hopes that she can get everything done in just a couple of weeks, but she does not know yet.
Nicole Sherbiny and Mahmoud Elsherbiny
Once again, Nicole notes that she and Mahmoud are doing better … because they are simply not talking about major, glaring issues. At all. She has now been in Egypt for a few months.
She is sleeping better
Nicole and Mahmoud have an air conditioner in their room. It looks relatively new. Mahmoud says something that sounds a little negative about her having run it extensively. It doesn’t look like she has it especially cold, but things like temperature preferences are so important to discuss before moving in together. We wonder if they skipped that talk. They seemed to skip so many others.
They actually looked at apartments!
Some of them have a lot of space. And the bathroom situation would be an instant upgrade. Not just because it’s a real bathroom (at Mahmoud’s mom’s house, there is just the one bathroom, and the shower stall is also the toilet. Nicole has to sweep the water down the drain after showering), but because they would not have to share it. However, Nicole despairs over Mahmoud having no desire to move out. He likes living with his mom, which leads to Nicole feeling stuck in their room for much of the day.
Nicole does have one little outlet
She knows that Mahmoud would not allow her to take any class where a man might be involved, but she signed up for an all-women guided meditation class. Some of the affirmations about self-worth and finding your voice clearly hit home with Nicole, who tears up.
After class, she chats with Nouran
Nouran is her instructor. Nouran is also an Egyptian woman, who tells her that she grew up under a lot of conservative house rules. But, later in her teens, her parents told her that she was an adult who could decide her own outfits and expressions of faith for herself. This is not an unusual experience for a Muslim woman, in Egypt or America.
Mahmoud and Nicole go out to dinner
He is clearly aware that Nicole is unhappy, but it looks like “not talking about their problems” is the most that he’s willing to do about it. Maybe he’ll surprise Nicole, and us, one day. But it’s not looking likely. The two eat hummus, but it’s very different from the American concept of hummus. It sounds more like a soup, maybe?
Nicole tells Mahmoud about her chat with Nouran
It sounds like Mahmoud doesn’t even like the idea of an all-women meditation class, but is mostly biting his tongue over it for Nicole’s sake. It is difficult to look at his pattern of behavior and see him as anything but toxic and controlling. But, like we said, maybe he’ll surprise us all.
Nicole’s conversation takes a turn
When she talks about how Nouran had discussed her own experiences dating Egyptian men — the good and the bad — Mahmoud clearly feels attacked. Nouran, for the record, had discussed how loving and affectionate Egyptian men can be, but she also acknowledged that many Egyptian men are like Mahmoud — very sheltered and very controlling.
Mahmoud worries that this woman will be a bad influence on Nicole
Of course, Nouran had told Nicole that there are many places in Egypt, and many people, where dressing in comfortable clothes won’t attract stares, where hanging out with friends is very normal. Mahmoud happens to be from a very conservative neighborhood. Is he worried that Nicole will grow to realize that “Egypt” isn’t what’s making her unhappy — he is? He does agree to meet Nouran.
They meet Nouran for dinner
She is Nicole’s first friend in Egypt who isn’t in Mahmoud’s family. Naturally, he dislikes her instantly. Of course, given what she has heard about him, it sounds like the feeling is mutual.
Mahmoud presents his ideas as nearly universal for Egypt
He and Nouran immediately delve into debates about culture, society, and religion … totally skipping over a lot of the usual social niceties. Nicole sort of becomes a spectator to their discussion.
Nouran is clearly taken aback
She later tells the camera that Mahmoud is very much the sort of guy who has a limited life experience and is deeply uncomfortable with anything outside of that. That makes sense, when it comes to a guy who is nearly 30 but uncomfortable with the idea of moving out of his mom’s place.
Mahmoud would not “allow” Nicole to take Nouran’s yoga class
Apparently, even the all-women meditation class is on thin ice. Yoga, where some students might be men, is right out. His big worry is that men might look at Nicole when she stretches. In his mind, that is Nicole’s problem.
They quickly slide into discussing theology
Mahmoud, who clearly doesn’t like Nouran’s outfit (she is wearing a dress), talks about body coverings. In his mind, the Quran is very clear about this. Of course, this is precisely how he grew up in his family and neighborhood.
Nouran is also a Muslim and also an Egyptian
She reminds him that the passages are less specific than he suggests, while pointing out specific writings in the Quran about following one’s heart. She talks about everything from hair health to personal religious expression.
Mahmoud’s views are fundamentally incompatible with gender equality
To his core, he believes that men and women are so fundamentally and intrinsically different by divine design. Nouran’s reply that breasts nourish babies does not seem to make an impression upon him. In his mind, the sexual desire that he feels towards a woman’s body is enough to justify why they should cover up. He doesn’t think that men’s legs inspire the same lustful thoughts (he’s wrong).
Nicole doesn’t know what to make of all of this
She’s just sitting there watching her husband argue with her friend. It’s fascinating — most religious debates are — but it’s clearly not going anywhere.
Later, Nouran chats with the camera
She shares that, very simply, if she were in Nicole’s shoes, she would leave. Nouran would not give up her freedom, no matter how much she loves someone.