90 Day Fiance The Other Way: Can Deavan and Jihoon Make It?

Deavan Clegg and Jihoon Lee

After last week’s emotional episode, things are relatively at ease. They’re on their way because Deavan is going to cook with Jihoon’s mom for a Korean tradition — Baek-il. The cooking together is just prep, but it’s traditionally done between the mom and the mother-in-law.

It’s not bad

But it quickly becomes clear that Jihoon’s mom has low expectations of Deavan. And she says as much. Meanwhile, Jihoon is watching Drascilla and Taeyang. This time, when Deavan reminds him to hold Drascilla’s hand, he takes it seriously.

To be fair …

Deavan, like countless busy parents, disabled folks, and people with limited time on their hands, generally buys most of her food pre-sliced, so she’s not exactly handy with a knife. Jihoon’s mom admits that Deavan isn’t very good at it, but she’s just being honest.

Jihoon doesn’t see the big deal

Until, that is, Deavan asks him how he’d feel if he had to cook with Elicia. The fear on Jihoon’s face is, well, an endearing moment and a reminder that these two really do care about each other.

On to the Baek-il

Drascilla is obviously excited for the party celebrating her baby brother.

Jihoon explains

For those of you unfamiliar, Jihoon explains that, like so many cultures, the grim reality of infant mortality meant that people had to accept that newborns didn’t just sometimes die, but regularly did. Countless cultures all over the world that ways of coping with this. In Korea, the solution was to celebrate the baby’s 100th day of life — a milestone in a world where so many infants died, and where celebrating a newborn could be bittersweet. This tradition endures even though infant mortality rates plummeted generations ago.

It’s a special event

Elicia cannot shake her memory of Jihoon’s previous carelessness with Drascilla (keep in mind, it was not the incident that we saw on television, but a second incident a short time later in which Drascilla was in actual danger because Jihoon was distracted instead of simply holding her hand), but she is putting a lid on her fury for this special day.

Deavan looks GORGEOUS in a hanbok

It’s so sweet how much she explains. In this case, she explains that Koreans pull out hanbok for formal occassions rather than everyday dress. You know, like how you dress one way to go to a wedding but if you wear that same outfit to do your grocery shopping, people assume that you’re in a cult.

And Jihoon!

He is a bit of a goofball about being dressed up so formally, but then so would people in the US if they were suddenly dressed like Civil War reenactors.

And Drascilla!

She is SO cute and so excited for her baby brother’s celebration. (Also, this is a great reminder of how little time has passed since last season — this was all filmed just 100 days after Taeyang was born, which was in Season 1. A lot of fans seem confused that this wasn’t filmed a full year after Season 1 was filmed, and thus assume that Drascilla is older than sh eis)

The little man of the hour!

Taeyang looks SO cute. Another child recently went viral for hsi Baek-il costume just a few years ago and Taeyang looks every bit as adorable.

It went off well!

Drascilla played with the other children and Jihoon praised her to the guests, noting that she is both energetic and smart. His grandmother accepted Deavan and Drascilla into the family, acknowledging Drascilla as her great-granddaughter. And as you can see, a lot of relatives who had been doubtful after hearing that Jihoon knocked up a random American girl couldn’t help but approve after this family gathering.

But really, it’s all about Taeyang

This is part of the traditional presentation of the baby, and it’s deeply cute. Congratulations!!!

Ariela Weinberg and Biniyam Shibre

Ariela is young, pregnant, and moving to Ethiopia. Her mom has come with her, but now, her visit is at an end. This isn’t easy for Ariela.

They have breakfast together

Janice says that she will miss the coffee in Ethiopia. But, to put things into perspective, she emphasizes that she will miss Ariela the most.

She knows her daughter well

Janice tells her that she knows that she’s having second thoughts, and reminds her that she can call her at any time. Janice will send her a ticket at a moment’s notice. She also says that, in the meantime, before her return in a few weeks for the baby’s birth, Ariela should give her a list of things that she will need.

Time to head to the airport

Janice knows that Ariela will feel lonely in Ethiopia. She doesn’t know many people there. And she feels like she needs to get to know Biniyam again after so much time apart.

To the airport

Biniyam is being so sweet and helpful … and then, of course, people without tickets can go no further.

It’s a difficult farewell

Ariela is trying to reign in her emotions but it is completely normal to cry when moving somewhere, even just to a new city. Change can be scary. In Ariela’s case, change can be utterly overwhelming.

The two sit down on a bench

Ariela is ALL UP in her feelings at the moment, which considering the many circumstances is more than fair. Biniyam wants to be emotionally supportive however he can.

They can work on communication

He promises to practice his English, which is sweet but obviously not a fix-all. (Also, this feels like yet another hint that their storyline is a stunt and that Ariela plans to move back to the US some time after the baby’s birth, right?)

But Ariela is straight up not having a good time

She admits that she’s not excited to be alone with him, and is probably being a little TOO honest at this point.

Brittany Banks and Yazan Abo Horira

Brittany and Yazan sit down for a chat on camera. They are still grappling with the aftermath of a huge fight — one that was sadly not caught on camera.

Brittany explains what went down

One of Yazan’s extended family found her social media after she tagged Yazan in a photo, and scrolled through everything. That’s fairly normal, right? Except when they found a (normal, Instagram-appropriate) photo of her, they claimed to the entire family that they’d found a pic of Brittany “naked.”

Does this look naked to you?

Keep in mind that Jordan has bikinis and Instagram models. Folks, there are bars and strip clubs in Jordan. It’s a country, not a monastery. However, it is clear that Yazan’s conservative family is happy to use any excuse to try to cause problems between them. What made things worse this time is that Yazan got “all in his feelings” about it and was taking their side.

Brittany didn’t stand for that

The only part of their spat that appeared to be caught on camera was Yazan trying to do one of his confessional segments and receiving furious texts from Brittany telling her exactly what she thought of him.

Hell hath no fury

We don’t generally approve of anyone in a relationship speaking to the other like this. That said, someone siding with his family’s absurd hang-ups is also garbage. Why are they putting themselves and each other through this?

Yazan explains

He notes that his family was saying that she is being disrespectful in a religous way by having this up. Really? This feels like an excuse to complain about her being on social media … and about her being engaged to Yazan.

Brittany will not be bullied

She’s not going to delete her social media, and she’s keeping it public to show his family that. Brittany also says, unconvincingly, that “Yazan is a virgin” after making it clear that his family would not be okay with him having premarital sex. Most of Brittany’s issues are about Yazan, but non-marital sex is criminalized in Jordan, so that’s one of the few issues that is actually related to the country’s laws and not to Yazan’s overbearing, conservative family.

Despite all of the obstacles …

Yazan is resolved to make this work because he loves Brittany. And clearly, she feels the same way.

Tim Clarkson and Melyza Zeta

This week, Tim’s story is very brief but important, as he looks to get a job in Columbia. He nearly boards a motorcycle rideshare but thinks better of it. He has never ridden a motorcycle and he’s not comfortable on one, and he also knows that traffic in Columbia is worse than what he is accustomed to.

He wants to do more work in tech support

Tim discusses his work experience, occassionally struggling to find the right words in Spanish but still communicating very well.

He’s told that he should marry Melyza

That would be the most convenient way for him to get legal documents necessary to work in Columbia. The problem? That’s not on Melyza’s radar, and after he cheated on her, it’s hard for him to imagine her going “sure, THIS is the reason we should get married.”

Kenneth Niedermeier and Armando Rubio

In the car with Kenneth’s adult daughters, Taylor and Cassidy, they are going out for tacos. You’re not going to find more authentic tacos than in Mexico or Texas (which was, of course, formerly part of Mexico).

Yum!

Okay, so Kenneth is a little picky, but that’s not unrelatable. He doesn’t like guacamole, which as someone who once thought the same but now loves it, makes me wonder if he tried one recipe and never tried another. But whatever, okay, he doesn’t have to eat anything that he doesn’t want to.

The bathroom situation was a nightmare

Armando is totally unfazed by a bathroom that lacks any actual plumbing. Kenneth has never had to use a bucket of water to flush a toilet before and this is one of his most relatable moments. It’s a gross toilet and it’s at a restaurant. There are a lot of different bathroom situations in the world and it is 100% reasonable for Kenneth to find this one off-putting.

Then …

Just as they’re having a talk with Kenneth’s daughters, someone unseen walks by and uses a (Spanish) homophobic slur, directing it at Kenneth and Armando.

Armando explains

At least one of Kenneth’s daughters heard it all on her own, but Kenneth missed it. Kenneth wishes that he had heard it and knew enough Spanish to say something back, but Armando (precious Armando, who must be protected at all costs) doesn’t like the idea of Kenneth getting into a potential fight.

Speaking of a fight

Taylor and Cassidy are FUMING. Kenneth’s daughters are adults and we have to imagine that this is not the first time that someone has said something awful about their dad. One of them wishes that she could punch the slur-spewer in the mouth. Can they get their own show when they just put on body armor and fight homophobes?

Armando isn’t even angry

He’s sad and this is exactly what he was afraid would happen — the same fear that has kept him in the closet for the first three decades of his life. He’s afraid of PDA with Kenneth. He’s afraid of violent retaliation against him, his fiance, their property. They won’t always be a party of four followed by a production crew, and he knows that. Armando deserves a better world than the one in which he is living.

Hate speech is not just mean words. Hate speech is a reminder that physical violence could come anywhere, at any time. Slurs are a reminder that some people do not see you as human. And as you can see, particularly with Armando, they’re used to force people to try to hide themselves for the “comfort” of bigots. No one deserves to be treated like this.