• Isn’t just great when the paparazzi brings lost souls together? Kate Moss and the cops … it’s just like cream cheese and lox. [The Sun]
• Tracy Morgan pleads not guilty to DUI charges. Guys, he wasn’t drunk. He always talks like that. [MSNBC]
• Terrell and Derell Brittenum won’t continue their American Idol dream. Because they’ll be in jail. [People]
• Why is Colin Farrell having so much trouble with that homemade porn flick? Uhh, he wasn’t wearing his lucky underpants. [Sun]
• Seriously? Clay Aiken is gay? [Page Six]
• The secret service decked out in club wear? Yep, everyone has pretty much given up on the Barbara and Jenna Bush twins. [Page Six]
• Katie Couric is just a little bit miffed producers didn’t brief her about the most memorable moment of Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. [NYDN]
• More evidence that Foxy Brown fired her lawyer Joseph Tacopina over more than his public reveal that she’s deaf: Foxy, it turns out, might not be as deaf as claimed. [Page Six]
• Mary-Kate Olsen still hasn’t forgiven Stavros Niarchos. And Rush & Molloy prove Page Six isn’t the only one in need of fact checkers, at least to spell someone’s (Mario Lavandeira) name correctly. [R&M]
• Despite video tape clearly showing Jenna Bush’s college ID, White House talking heads say she never lost her wallet (that is, ditched) at LES spot Happy Ending. [Page Six]
• Sports owner and blogger Mark Cuban wishes just one thing for his daughter: That she develop cankles. [Page Six]
• Most expensive nap on Broadway? Oprah’s The Color Purple, where Broadway vet Hal Prince snoozed off during the first act. [Lowdown]
• Ashlee Simpson doesn’t only battle sore throats — she once battled anorexia. [People]
• Term papers, like eating, just aren’t Mary-Kate’s thing. [Page Six]
• Christina Aguilera might have a hard time consummating her marriage to Jordan Bratman, given his professed extra large endowment. [R&M]
• Ever since Chelsea Clinton quickly unhitched herself from Tara Reid’s hip after mama Hillary got word of their pairing, Tara’s been looking for a new friend. And she’s found one in the form of Kirsten Dunst, the ex-good girl turned party girl. [Perez Hilton]
• First Lindsay Lohan, now an identified clubgoer at Cain. The fake celebrity swindling just keeps on keeping on, this time with a faux Jude Law snagging a female nightcap. [Page Six]
• What was Britney Spears‘ biggest investment on her trip to NYC with Kevin Federline? After seeing Sweet Charity (in which the talent-challenged duo may star), the pop tart got inch long fingernails to scratch at any photog without a contract. [Page Six]
• How appropriate: Jenna Bush parties at Fat Girl. [Page Six]
• Most inventive way to get out of an interview with the New York Post? If you’re Lara Flynn Boyle, get written off your TV show. [NYP]
• Congrats to Lloyd Grove, who got a whopping $90 bucks for selling off his personally autographed copy of Scooter Libby’s bestiality book on eBay. [Lowdown]
• Everyone together now: “Awww!” That goes out to George Clooney, who felt depressed while shooting Syriana because of all the weight he had to gain. [The Scoop]
• Ex-Men’s Journal editor Michael Caruso once again spotted dining at Michael’s with Men’s Health editor David Zinczenko. Friends? Colleagues? Dan Abrams image consultants? [Page Six]
It’s Friday, so we figured we’d spice up your weekend entry with a little political nipplage. To make it even more rioutous, we’re gonna give you a chance to guess which political offspring this areola belongs to.
The answer (and full photo) after the jump.
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