90 Day Fiance viewers have been wondering why Yvette Arellano and Mohamed Abdelhamed are together at all.
They have fundamentally different ideas about many things, from faith to how Yvette should live her life.
It’s not just that they’re together — they’re actually discussing the idea of having a child.
Mohamed is adamant that he doesn’t want Yve to influence their child’s beliefs. Oh dear.
“We’ve spoken about having a child together,” Yvette Arellano gushes to the confessional camera.
While sitting beside him, she praises: “I just feel like Mohamed would be an amazing father.”
In the Episode 11 sneak peek, she expresses: “I would really love to share that experience with him.”
Yvette knows that her age could be a factor, but Mohamed is very casual about this.
“If not,” he promises, “that not bothers me.”
Mohamed then adds: “I leave that to God.”
But while Mohamed and Yvette exercise at the gym, Mohamed lays down some ground rules if they do have a kid.
“It’s very important if I have a child,” he begins, “I will take my child to the mosque with me.”
He is saying that he plans to raise their child as a Muslim, even though Yve is not.
Yvette asks: “If the child is more interested in what I believe in and what I’m doing, what’s going to happen?”
“Let me make something clear,” Mohamed insists.
He continues: “My child, you can’t get him confused about his religion while I’m teaching him something.”
“You can’t just take me out of the equation if we have a child,” an alarmed Yvette points out.
She then asks: “What if they say, ‘I want to go with Mommy’ or something like that?”
Mohamed doubles down, asserting: “It’s very simple. My child will be Muslim.”
Speaking to the confessional camera, Mohamed’s point of view becomes even more hostile.
“If the child will be raised in the spirituality that Yve believes in,” he speculates.
Mohamed continues: “It’s going to end up with a kid drinking alcohol and dating and doesn’t know what he should do.” And???
Well, that sneak peek was very toxic. But obviously, interfaith marriages are very possible.
That does not mean that they are right for every couple.
Yve and Mohamed are missing a key component of a successful interfaith relationship: mutual respect.
Yvette cleaned out her closet, eliminated pork from her diet, and cut down on drinking to please Mohamed.
Yes, Mohamed left his life in Egypt behind to come and live with Yve.
But as far as his beliefs are concerned, his one compromise has been sleeping with her … which is not exactly a sacrifice.
More than that, it is extremely clear when Mohamed speaks that he is not merely cataloguing differences.
He very explicitly believes that Yvette is worse.
Mohamed said it himself — she was raised with “too much freedom,” which he fails to see as a good thing.
When he talks about wanting his child to be a Muslim, it’s because he feels that this is the only correct way to be.
(Obviously, he is not unique, as there are Christians and others who feel the same way)
What Mohamed is really saying is that he doesn’t see Yvette as a good or worthy person — or parent.
If you don’t think that your partner is a good person, you owe it to them and to yourself to end the relationship.
You certainly should not have a child with a “bad” person, whether you’re right or not.
Mohamed’s obvious contempt for Yvette will continue to play out over this season, as a midseason trailer made clear.
There is another element to this: the human rights of their hypothetical child.
Frankly, whether a relationship is interfaith or homogeneous, every human — including children — has a right to choose their beliefs.
One has to wonder at the “value” of faith that is forced upon someone, instead of chosen.
With all of this in mind … do Yvette and Mohamed even have anything in common?
Aside from rock-hard abs, we mean.
Why is he with a woman whom he believes to be bad? Why is she with a man with whom she should never have a child?