It’s been a long time since the general public actually cared about what the cast of Jersey Shore is up to, but remarkably, the Seaside Heights gang appears to be holding up pretty well post-fame.
Well, most of them are, anyway.
While Snooki, Vinny and the rest have carved out careers for themselves doing podcasts and appearing at “Hey, remember this guy?” conventions, Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino hasn’t fared quite as well.
The Sitch still makes the occasional headline these days, but it’s never for anything good.
In fact, when we see his name these days, it’s usually because Sorrentino was arrested again.
Most recently, Mike was locked up for his involvement in some sort of tanning salon melee, which is either the most appropriate or most ironic arrest in history.
We can’t decide.
But it was the arrest prior to that that’s still giving Mike legal headaches, and it could wind up landing him behind bars of a very long time.
Mike was busted for tax fraud back in 2014, and it seems he still hasn’t sorted the issue out with the feds.
Today, TMZ is reporting that Mike is still facing decades behind bars for tax evasion.
The IRS claims that Sorrentino conspired with his brother (who’s also facing jail time) to conceal a significant portion of the $8.9 million that Mike made between 2010 and 2012.
Yes, the freakin’ Situation made $8.9 million in two years.
And you thought today’s political news was depressing!
Anyway, far from backing down and working out a restitution plan, the U.S. Attorney in New Jersey is going hard on Sorrentino, adding a handful of new charges this week.
Mike now faces allegations of tax evasion, as well as structuring and falsifying records to avoid detection of assets.
Prosecutors maintain that the Sorrentino brothers filed false income tax returns and made fraudulent deductions.
No trial date has been set, but it sounds like Mike may soon have quite the situation on his hands.
Hey, at least if he goes to prison he’ll have plenty of time to work on his abs.
And that’s it.
We’ve exhausted out supply of The Situation jokes.
If you’re keeping score at home, there were exactly two.
Any more than that would require remembering more about The Situation than his stupid nickname and ab obsession and frankly, we can’t spare the brain real estate.