Justin Bieber is currently taking a few days off from his South American tour.
But just because he’s not taking the stage for a few days, that doesn’t mean the Biebs isn’t giving any private performances, if ya know what we mean.
For those of you who aren’t big on awkwardly heavy-handed innuendo, we’re implying that Justin’s been gettin’ it in with a new lady friend during his time south of the Equator:
Her name is Luciana Chamone, and according to those who have been monitoring Bieber’s time abroad, she’s been spending a lot of time with the singer.
Not much is known about Luciana other than the fact that she was a big time Belieber even before spending she became the recipient of his affections.
A quick scan of Luciana’s social media profiles proves that she spends a lot of time at the beach and basically lives in a bikini.
It’s unknown how serious the relationship between Justin and Luciana is, or even if they’re in a relationship at all.
Luciana has been spotted traveling with Justin in the backseat of several chauffeured vehicles, band the pair is often joined by Luciana’s BFF, Marina Pumar.
Naturally, a lot of conclusions have been drawn about the frequent presence of a third party, but we’ll leave that one alone for now.
The Biebs hasn’t been getting along well with his fans lately, and spending his downtime with Luciana instead of meeting and greeting with Brazilian Beliebers probably won’t do him many favors, but what are ya gonna do?
Justin is merely enjoying one of the many perks of international pop stardom.
Is there any future between Justin and Luciana?
Almost certainly not, and that’s part of the point.
Eventually, Justin will return to the States.
He’ll probably even get back together with Selena Gomez a few more times.
But right now, he’s fully enjoying a Lost In Translation moment with Luciana (and probably one or more of her friends).
Except instead of moping around Tokyo to a twee indie soundtrack, Justin is having hotel group sex in Brazil.
We didn’t think it was possible to out-cool Bill Murray, but Justin may have won this round.
You’ll get him next time, Bill.