It looks like Leonardo DiCaprio’s fabled p–sy posse may soon regain one its original members.
No, Leo didn’t finally text Donald Trump back.
We’re talking about Tobey Maguire, who used to be one of Leo’s main wingmen before he married Jennifer Meyer back in 2007.
Tobey and Jennifer announced today that they’ve decided to call it quits after nearly a decade of marriage.
“After much soul searching and consideration we have made the decision to separate as a couple,” reads a statement the couple issued to People magazine.
“As devoted parents, our first priority remains raising our children together with enduring love, respect and friendship.”
Maguire and Meyer (Their names even rhyme!) met in 2003 and married four years later in Hawaii.
There’s been no word as to what may have caused the spit, and the couple has issued the usual plea for privacy.
No offense to the state of Tobey’s career, but, um … we don’t think that’ll present much of a problem.
But hey, there was a time when Maguire was one of the biggest names (or at least the recognizable faces) in Hollywood.
At one point, he was doing the Affleck thing – headlining both superhero projects and Oscar winning prestige fair.
Maybe, as Ben’s separation from Jennifer Garner proves, that sort of success is just too much for a couple to endure.
Except in Tobey’s case it took like eight years.
Oh, who are we kidding?
We all know what really happened here!
Obviously, Jennifer was tidying up the bedroom one day when she found the DVD that Tobey had been hiding in the drawer of his nightstand since before they were married.
She popped it in and was shocked to see her husband – the father of her children! – engaged in all manner of unspeakable acts.
By the time the credits rolled on Spider-Man 3, she knew she would have to move on.
Yes, that was a long, elaborate joke about how Tobey’s career isn’t going so great these days.
Now if you’ll excuse us, we have $33 worth of Natural Ice cans to return to the store.
This ’98 Honda Civic isn’t gonna insure itself!