Hey, remember the 40,000 times you thought the 2016 presidential election couldn't possibly get any more ridiculous?
Well, it seems that you were wrong yet again, as Tuesday's Pepe the Frog affair has been replaced as the controversy of the week, thanks to a dust-up over the email account of a former Secretary of State.
No, not that Secretary of State (though we're sure you'll hear more about her emails after this whole "Hillary is mere moments from death" business cools off).
We're talking about Colin Powell, whose emails were hacked yesterday, revealing what could most generously be described as his strong dislike for both current candidates.
Based on his correspondence, Powell holds a deep disdain for Donald Trump (whom he calls "a national disgrace and an international pariah"), but isn't that crazy about the real estate mogul's opponent, either.
Powell has previously expressed frustration over Hillary Clinton's handling of the investigation into her use of a private email server, especially her habit of reminding critics that Powell also used a private email account when "engaging with Department officials" during his time as Secretary of State.
His frustrations are clear in a number of the correspondences sent by Powell that were posted on the DC Leak website yesterday following a hack orchestrated earlier this week.
"I have told Hilleary's [sic] minions repeatedly that they are making a mistake trying to drag me in, yet they still try," Powell wrote in one email.
"Everything HRC touches she kind of screws up with hubris," reads another, which was sent by Powell to Democratic mega-donor Jeffrey Leeds.
Powell goes on to joke that he should "send [Clinton] a bill" for overcharging a university for a speaking engagement to the point that the school came under fire and had to cancel a scheduled speech from Powell.
Then things really get interesting:
First, Powell reveals to Leeds that the Obamas and Clintons have not gotten along ever since President Obama "kicked [Hillary's] ass" in the 2008 Democratic primaries.
(He even claims that Bill and Hillary refer to Barack as "that man.")
Powell then outlines his exact feelings about Hillary in brutal fashion and includes a new allegation about her husband's infidelity for good measure:
Well, it's a nice that he calls her a friend, but we're guessing Hillary would've preferred if her buddy Colin left out the part about her husband "dicking bimbos on the side."
It seems to us that there are three main takeaways from all of this:
1. Washington is basically your high school cafeteria.
2. "Dick" is a verb now.
3. Colin Powell will probably be staying home on Election Day.