Kendra on Top Recap: Dirty Thirty, Holly Madison Edition!

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Kendra Wilkinson celebrated the big 3-0 on Kendra on Top this week. But did she mark the occasion by cheating on husband Hank Baskett?!?

You can't blame us for wondering, given that it's the ENTIRE PREMISE OF THE SHOW ... but no, it appears K-Dubs made it to Dirty 30 sans affairs.

On Kendra on Top Season 4 Episode 8, we began with Kendra on Worst Cooks in America: Celebrity Edition. Yes, that is an actual show.

As she put it, she "started the day fighting with [Hank] about a gay bar and now I'm talking to Greg Brady about how he did Camp Playboy."

"This day could not get any weirder."

While she avoided elimination with a dope grilled cheese, Kendra was still feeling bummed out on her 30th birthday the following day.

But then ... the best surprise ever!

Hank and Lil' Hank came to visit, which truly made her day in spite of the fact that, well, she doesn't like being caught off guard. At all.

"I'm so happy you guys made it out there, even though I hate surprises. Please don't surprise me again," Kendra tells her husband.

Yikes. Wait until she sees the car.

Those who watch Kendra on Top online know that Hank picked out a hot ride for his girl, also without her knowing. How'd that go over?

Let's just say it was good and bad. She definitely did not hate that surprise, which was good. She was pretty darn excited to be honest.

The bad news? She kissed Hank on the mouth, which we know she's not a fan of; Kendra has been open about this intimacy issue.

Still, the car gift and the birthday visit to the Worst Cooks set were a net positive, and things were looking up ... until this bombshell:

Holly Madison has written a book!

In Down the Rabbit Hole, she alleges Kendra demanded a car, dental work and the biggest room, and is so fake, she "cultivated" her own laugh.

Among many other things. It's harsh.

We can't speak to the accuracy of those claims, but we can tell you that Holly Madison ripped Kendra pretty hard, and she was pissed.

Baskett shrugs the book off as a desperate ploy for attention, but Wilkinson was not about to toss it in the dustbin and move on with life.

Not when she can milk it for drama! fumes.

"All we really did was f--k the same man," Kendra rages to BFF Jessica Hall. "Seven years later, this bi!ch is talking about sh!t when I was 18, 19, 20,"

Unlike Madison, Wilkinson has "zero regrets" about her time at the Mansion and says what a lot of us are probably thinking at least in part:

Is Madison really complaining about the very lifestyle that made her famous, then turning around and trashing Playboy for bitter revenge?

Really, Holly Madison?

While they clearly should just let it go, Kendra and Jessica are livid, and Kendra on Top Season 4 Episode 9 ends with a cliffhanger.

"Let's go confront this bitch," Wilkinson says, though it remains to be seen if she will actually come face to face with Madison over this.

One can hope.

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