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NEWS FLASH: Everybody is a perfect parent until they have kids.

From saying inane things like "Wearing underwear on your head does not give you the ability to fly" to finding yourself with the TV on children’s programming long after the littles are asleep, parenting is one colossal mind game for which one cannot prepare.

People caution "just wait until you’re a parent," and you don’t listen.

Because of course you don’t. That totally won’t happen to you when you shoot out some spawn and then vow to raise them for the rest of your life. Nope! No way!

You won’t be THAT parent. You’re NOT that parent. But you are. Probably. But just in case the kids running crazy through your house weren’t enough, here are 11 signs you’re a parent …

Parenting becomes immensely easier when you learn to embrace the hilarity and insanity of the moment, but unfortunately that clarity only comes with time. Lots and lots of time.

Or by learning from the example of some of the many parents (and children) who’ve been down this road before you. Crying because a cracker is, well, cracked?

It’s totally funny when you stop to think about it …