The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Recap: High Heels & Low Expectations

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The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills claim "The Higher the Heel, the Closer to God" but what if they're only platform boots. Makes you wonder!

We recap all the campy shoe choices and strange animal moments in THG's +/- review:

Adrienne & Kyle Shop

Kyle and Adrienne meet at a posh kid's boutique to pick out something for Portia's fourth birthday and Kyle thinks Adrienne is looking for pants for herself.

What? Apparently Kim is small enough to shop for clothes there too.

Minus 20. If you are a grown woman you should NOT be able to fit into kids clothes.  If you can, you really need to rethink your diet because something is very wrong.

Taylor gets Paul and Mauricio to agree to don heels for a domestic violence charity walk.  Plus 15 to Mauricio for walking the walk.  At least those were real heels.  Paul's platform boots were a complete cheat.  The least he could have done was wear those chunky Dorothy heels or a pair of kitten pumps.  What's a few crunched toes for charity?

Yolanda's job these days seems to be managing her daughter Gigi's modeling career.  I have to say the girl is a knock out. She looks just like her Mama did at that age. Plus 10.  

And although Yolanda borders on meddling, her advice seems to be spot on most of the time.

Kyle throws Portia's fourth birthday party and Kyle seems upset when ponies show up instead of unicorns.  Um…Kyle. I hate to burst the fantasy but…

And I guess she should have specified white unicorns.  I'll almost give her that one. In what movie have you ever seen a brown unicorn? Minus 11.

Between the llamas and the ponies, Kyle really should have hired a popper scooper. Minus 8.

Overall it's a pretty boring party but I couldn't believe Kyle thought everyone would be on their best behavior because it was a kid's party.  Minus 13. That's pretty naive. She gives these girls more credit than I do.

Plus 15 to Brandi Glanville for at least trying to keep the peace, however Taylor had no trouble spreading the gossip.  Minus 10 because although Taylor looked a bit happier than we've seen her, she definitely needed some makeup…or how about some time in the sunlight.  I think all of that botox is doing strange things to her skin.

Kyle tells Lisa she doesn't mean to meddle…except that's exactly what she's doing. Plus 12 to Lisa for telling her the feud with Adrienne is no one else's business.

Now if Adrienne would only man up and apologize.  Like that's going to happen.


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