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Stop us if you’ve heard this before, but a woman who claims to be Michael Jackson’s illegitimate love child says she’s entitled to money from his estate!

Mocienne Petit Jackson says she was conceived when Michael was a minor and has filed legal documents alleging an evil plot to cover up her existence.

Yes, we’re serious. Move over, Prince Michael Malachi Jet Jackson, you’ve got nothing on the latest supposed MJ spawn in terms of creative storytelling.

Her tale is one involving murder, abduction and Diana Ross’ sister. Mocienne Petit Jackson claims that way back in 1975, a 17-year-old Michael Jackson secretly impregnated her mother Barbara … who happens to be Diana Ross’ sister.

Diana and Michael were close – his will left her in control of his three minor children in the even his mother predeceased him. More on his mom below …

Mocienne Petit Jackson’s claims are truly off the wall.

Mocienne claims that when she was nine years old, Katherine Jackson, the late singer’s mother and legal guardian of his three actual children, hatched a plan to “abduct” MPJ and send her to Belgium to protect MJ’s “reputation.”

She claims all seven of her abductors were later murdered.

Petit Jackson, who currently lives in the Netherlands, has decided to come forward now so she can “formally claim my part of my father’s inheritance.” Hilariously, she also wants custody of MJ’s kids so she can give them a “more normal life.”

Right, she can definitely offer that.

Mocienne Petit Jackson also claims she was diagnosed with Vitiligo … so, yeah. The whole skin thing. She filed documents with L.A. County Superior Court claiming she deserves a fat inheritance check if a judge will just green light a DNA test.

We wouldn’t hold our breath.