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Carrie Prejean has played the God card.

The Miss USA contestant – who has been all over the news for telling judge Perez Hilton that she believes marriage ought to be reserved for a man and woman – sat down with Fox News this week and actually said the ordeal is simply a test from God.

Right. She’s a regular Jonah.


Here are a few excerpts from the fair and balanced interview:

On how she’s feeling: Happy. This happened for a reason. By having to answer that question in front of a national audience, God was testing my character and faith. I’m glad I stayed true to myself.

On the question about gay marriage:  I knew he was controversial, and so was the question. Out of all the topics I studied up on, I dreaded that one, I prayed I would not be asked about gay marriage. If I had any other question, I know I would have won.

On her response: I have no regrets about answering honestly. [Perez Hilton] asked me for my opinion and I gave it to him. I have nothing against gay people, and I didn’t mean to offend anyone in my answer.

On her post-pageant activity: I ate my first hamburger in a long time!

So, to recap: Carrie Prejean took part in a beauty pageant, in order to be asked a question about gay marriage, to which she responded by denying homosexuals basic human rights, which simply proved her faith to God, but doesn’t mean she has anything against gay people. And her reward, after starving herself for months, was a hamburger.

Everyone got it?