We cried tears of joy over Eva Longoria nude photos a few months ago.
But Ryan Seacrest, being our favorite metrosexual, saved the tears for Eva's first dance with new husband Tony Parker.
"I am crying," confessed wedding guest Seacrest on his KIIS-FM radio show Monday morning.
In a 17th Century French castle where the reception was held Saturday night, People magazine reported Peter Gabriel's cover of the Magnetic Fields song "Book of Love" played, and the bride and groom â€" who had a church wedding earlier â€" "were just staring at each other," Seacrest said. "Then Tony dipped Eva right then and there, pulled her back up and gave her a kiss."
That's when the American Idol host, standing with Teri Hatcher, Felicity Huffman and Jessica Alba, lost it. "They are smiling and I am a disaster," he said.
We wish Simon Cowell had been there to mock this blubbering fool.
Supposedly, though, wasn't a mess during the week leading up to the Paris nuptials when Longoria and Parker entertained their guests in Parker's native country.
At one dinner, Ryan Seacrest got all giddy about a French painter who Tony Parker hired to create a celebrity picture of his future bride at the party.
"He did it in like two minutes and it was perfect," Seacrest said. Against a black canvas, "he did this Cirque du Soleil type dance with two white paint brushes...He starts to paint and paint and what you see is Tony playing basketball and everyone is thinking: OK that is kind of cool.
Then he runs back up to the canvas and messes it up like he screwed up. ... Then he flips the painting over and make two dots with his brush, left and right, and it is Eva Longoria in every detail."
In other words: it's a gorgeous painting. We may hire this dude to do one of Megan Fox nude.